Showing posts with label my opinion & ramble. Show all posts
Showing posts with label my opinion & ramble. Show all posts

Saturday, August 23, 2025

Letter Commentary: John Misses Julian

5 years ago, I posted a previous Letter Commentary about the Hamburg letter. Now that it's 60 years since this letter was written, I decided to do this again. I'll be "ripping" apart the letter to insert my commentary in between.

Where's pages 1 through 5?

Dot - Jarlett the housekeeper
Lil - Cynthia's mother
Bennie - maybe Dot's husband?
Tommy - I don't know
Jocky - I don't know but maybe John's chauffeur before he hired Les Anthony?

Whoever they all may be, they were constant visitors to the Lennon household and John was annoyed by them always being there preventing private family alone time.
While everyone could take a hike for all John's care, the one person he didn't want to send off was Julian.
I guess this is the point where John realized that Julian, being at the age of 2 years, was becoming a little man, having his own personality, and being more verbal.
I can't help but "Awwww" this part, without fail. This kinda gets to me the most.
The sad part of this part of the letter was that although I am sure John genuinely meant every single word he wrote on paper, unfortunately bad habits are hard to break. He went back to the cycle of being into his own little world, distracted, and wanted his ME time. I'm glad John acknowledged his regret of not being there for Julian - it certainly haunted him until his dying day. 
I love you very much. To Cyn from John ... Sounds like a greeting card or a present note of to & from. 27 kisses.
Charles was Cynthia's brother. At this time, Cynthia was in Libya. 
And John was determined for Cynthia to call him, was he?

Also, I wonder if anybody ever attempted to dial that number? By using California's area code. 

Thursday, October 10, 2024

What If: Another Baby?

 I've always been curious what if John and Cynthia had another child? What would they have named it? There was always an intention of having another child - which I will get to that momentarily. What if John and Cynthia had a daughter? Cynthia did say if Julian had been a girl then he would've been named Julia. Julian has middle names: Charles John. All three names were after family members. Would Julia have a middle name? Probably not. Cynthia didn't have a middle name (yet according to the internet, her middle name "is" Lillian. However I haven't seen any official documents that says so. Her marriage certificate to John Winston Lennon doesn't have a middle name for Cynthia Powell. Her art school documents like attendance records, reports, etc. doesn't provide Cynthia a middle name as it did for John Winston Lennon. So, until I see definite proof like a birth certificate that her middle name is Lillian, I won't believe it.) Although her mother Lillian did have a middle name (John's mother Julia did not) as did a number of other relatives on both sides of the family, I wound say 50/50%. If so, I'd think Lillian, Mary (Mimi), Elizabeth (John's Aunt Mater), Dorothy (Jarlett and Rhone), and Astrid (Kirchherr) would be top contenders. 

What if another boy? Possibly George (after Mimi's husband), Stuart (after Sutcliffe), Brian (Epstein), and Anthony (Cynthia's brother).
Or maybe it would have its own independent name .... those ideas died with John and Cynthia. 

Well, anyway, back to reality: both John and Cynthia were willing to have more children, but it didn't happen. John was away a lot and when touring was over, he immersed into drugs. Because of that, their sex life went down the toilet. 

Question: With that much experiences behind you now, would you like to have more children? (Interview, 1965)
"Yeah, as many as they come. Let them roll out. I like large families, the idea of it."

"I now take notice of other kids, and compare them to Julian. I think to myself,'That's clever, I don't think mine can do that' or vice versa. A lot of people like having children for their old age. I just want them because I like them."
John

I have heard one of the drugs John was taking slowed down his sperm count but I don't know if that's accurate as Yoko quickly got pregnant when they first slept together. There were rumors of Cynthia having another baby though, probably around the time when their home was being renovated and there was a room set aside for another addition to the family. Whenever John heard about this, he went nuts! John did say it wasn't a lousy rumor, but he was annoyed that it was getting out of hand. He had spent a good year trying the shoot down that rumor. Fans usually sent gifts for Julian, and would give gifts for the next child (that wasn't to be).

"I'm even getting them for a new baby I haven't even got. But I'm keeping it anyway because I'm bound to have one one day."
John, 1964

Question: What do you think of the rumors that got spread about you in gossip magazines? (Interview, 1964)
"I don't give it much thought other than the one about my wife having more children than I can account for."

"Me leaving the group... and my wife being pregnant."
John, 1964

"Luella Parsons writes a whole article about all the rumors, spreading them all again ... I'm getting another baby, which I'm not. Which isn't even a lousy rumor."
John, 1964

"It's just ridiculous, you know, if anything does happen, we'll tell people, you know? We're not going to hide it. John's not ashamed if he has another baby, now why should he sort of keep it secret?"
Ringo Starr, 1964

"Oh, well, you see, you seem to have no libel laws over here, seeing as magazines write anything. One magazine called Truth - I won't name it but it's called Truth, T-R-U-T-H, wrote a big pack of lies about how my wife broke the news to me about me baby and how she cried, and I went off, and Ringo said, 'John, you must share your wife.' It was a pack of lies, she's not having a baby!"
John, 1964

"I know it's in a magazine called Truth about us having another baby. It's a lie! Dirty lie! I don't know what the slander laws are over here, but I'm certainly going to investigate them."
John, 1964

"My wife having a baby, and the tagline to the page was, 'Ringo asks John to share wife,' you know."
John, 1964

"I have only one child and none on the way."
John, 1965

"Well, I just think it's potty, you know. Sort of mental - the people who write them. Unless they get it off somebody who convinced them that these things are true, otherwise they must be a bit mental, you know."
John

By 1966, the pregnancy rumor died down. However, the desire to have another child didn't. Around 1967, early 1968, John spent the weekend with The Beatles press officer Derek Taylor, his wife Joan, and their 6 children, Timothy, Dominic, Gerard, Abigail, Vanessa and Annabel (at the time, they had five). Derek had just returned back from living in California for a few years. John stayed at their Ascot home, taking LSD, putting a few tokes of marijuana, and Derek stroking John's ego. Cynthia, for some reason other than her dislike for LSD, didn't go. When John came home, he was happy, telling Cynthia they should have more children. Cynthia knew John had tripped out - his previously idea was to buy an island to live on. 

"Impossible hopes. John said to me just before we went to India that he wanted us to have more children. Well that came out of the blue, I can tell you. I was really surprised, as he'd never said a word about that before. Then again, why not? I wasn't averse to the idea. It wasn't as if we were too old to have any more. I was not yet 29, after all, while John would turn 28 that October. We still had more than enough time. I suppose what concerned me was Julian. A 5 or 6 year gap between siblings is quite wide, isn't it?"
Cynthia, 1989

I am sorry, I have to interrupt here. While the gap was wide, sure, but did Cynthia forget the age gap between her and her brothers? They were almost 10 by the time Cynthia arrived! Anyway, let's proceed....

"I would have loved to have 3 or 4 children, actually and to have had them all close together. It just hadn't happened. But maybe I was apparently distracting his meditation. It was all my fault, and John was a bear about it. He started grumping all over the place, snapping at me, insisting that we sort our useless accommodation out and that we were going to have to sleep in separate rooms from now on, before he went round the bend. It was humiliating and hurtful. I'm sure the others all knew what was going on, not that anyone even said anything to me. Even then I was convinced that I could bring him back to me, if you know what I mean. How stupid and blinkered I was. I know now that this was John up to his old tricks again, saying one thing but meaning another. Just like when he was on the road and he'd write to me all the time, telling me how deeply he loved me and how desperately he missed me. Just the way he used to when we were at art school. But when he was at home and actually with me, under the same roof, he was either asleep, ignoring me or picking pointless fights. He'd much rather read a book than talk to me. He always wanted what he couldn't have, did John. Never what was under his nose. When he had me, he didn't want me. God help me, I was clutching at straws. It got me wondering whether I been enough for him. I searched my soul in the ashram and it was the only conclusion I could come to. "
Cynthia, 1989

Obviously, wanting to have another child desire was short lived. Meanwhile Pete Shotgun proceeded to stay in the guest bedroom that was intended to be another child's room.

I don't know why Cynthia didn't have any more children, including her two other marriages (by the time Cynthia got to her fourth marriage, she was already long dried up, menopausal). Maybe there was a miscarriage, or, simply, it just never happened. 

"I think I'm past it now."
Cynthia, 1980

"55 and menopausal."
Cynthia, 1995

Saturday, February 18, 2023

Happy 90!

Happy 90th Birthday to Yoko!

I know Yoko is not the favorite in the John and Cynthia story, she's been made to be a villain. However, not everyone is perfect and sometimes someone would get wrapped up into this phenomenon that can get uncontrollable. I have been researching Yoko for the past few years (to celebrate her 90th Birthday for my Women of the Beatles Facebook and Instagram, including this blog) and I certainly have gotten to know a bit about her. Her upbringing hasn't been easy, nor were her relationship with her parents: a father who demanded perfection on the piano, a mother who cared more about her beauty and furs. So many experiences in her 90 years, it's honestly incredible. 

Sunday, April 10, 2022

Thanks, Mo

On March 30, 2003, I launched a website dedicated to the friendship between Cynthia and Maureen. It was never intended to be a serious-type website, meant to be updated rarely, and a great source to use on this post. Plus, I am the same writer on Cyn & Mo website and this blog, so I don't have to be mad that my work gets 'copied'. No plagiarism claims here! Obviously, the friendship between Cynthia and Maureen is special to me. They saw The Beatles struggle in sweaty smelling clubs to reach for success. Despite the almost 7 years age difference, they stuck together through divorces, new loves, John's death, moving around the world, and Maureen's death. The friendship didn't end there - Cynthia was quite open to reveal how much she missed Maureen. When Cynthia died, one of my first thoughts was picturing Cynthia and Maureen immediately hugging in Heaven. 

Cynthia and Maureen in Austria while The Beatles filmed Help! on location, March of 1965

I can't exactly pinpoint exactly when Cynthia and Maureen met but it was definitely at the Cavern Club. Maureen was a dedicated goer, so they must have encountered before Maureen got involved with Ringo by August of 1962. I like to think that Maureen was one of those "girlfriend defenders" from the other group of fans that were jealous and slag off Cynthia and other musicians' girlfriends whenever opportunity came up. They could have seen each other across the room, chatted, hung out and drank Coca-Cola. I believe Cynthia and Maureen started to get together more often by late-1963 when Maureen's relationship with Ringo got very serious when The Beatles moved to London full time. They really got close when Ringo and Maureen got married on February 11, 1965; Cynthia attended the wedding. Come to think of it, Cynthia attended both of Maureen's weddings! Maureen remarried to Isaac Tigrett on May 27, 1989, and Cynthia was the only "Beatles family circle" to attend. I know for sure Maureen didn't go to Cynthia's weddings to John (1962)  and Noel Charles (2002; Maureen died in 1994); not to Roberto Bassanini (July 31, 1970) but Maureen did go to a later wedding celebration. There is a possibility that Maureen attended Cynthia's wedding to John Twist (May 1, 1976). Well, anyway, the time Ringo and Maureen welcomed their first baby Zak born in September of 1965, they recently moved in Sunny Heights, near Kenwood, in Weybridge, Surrey. Sunny Heights and Kenwood were 10 minutes drive - although Ringo would walk home from John's and John would take Julian on a motorcycle ride to Ringo's. From 1965-1968, John and Ringo were the closest during that time as neighbors, hanging out with each other during free time. The one vacation that they all went was Trinidad and Tobago in January of 1966. There was the India meditation but that was only 10 days and with the company of George, Pattie, Paul, and Jane. 

"I don’t think his marriage will affect The Beatles’ popularity really, but there might be some shuffling of fans from one of the Beatles to another, at least that’s what happened to when news that I was married was revealed.” 
John, 1965

 “I don’t think the two of us being married has had any bad effects on our popularity. Remember, when it got out that both Ringo and I were married, there hadn’t been anybody in such a position as we were in, who had got married. It was Silver disc as opposed to Gold disc, people who’d get married before us!” 
John, 1965

"Ringo had this habit of lighting up two cigarettes, one for Maureen at the same time he lit his own. I remember thinking it was a loving thing to do and wishing John did it for me. But that would have been too obviously demonstrative, maybe, for John" 
Cynthia, 1985

Julian and Zak on a boat in Weybridge
Photographed by Ringo Starr

Do your families associate with one another socially? (Press Conference, 1966)
"Oh yeah. Our wives mix together. Our parents don't mix together much. Well, no, I mean, they don't see each other every day." John 

"St. George's Hill. I lived there until '69. John and I were both in St. George's Hill and George was in Esher and so the three of us were in the same area. Paul was the man about town at this time. He liked to take his dog for walks on Hampstead Heath and places like that. I mainly saw John in that period because we lived a couple of block from each other. We used to spend practically every weekend together. We'd edit 8mm film and have fun- sometimes hysterical fun. I'd walk home. John had Julian and I had Zak so we'd try to do the fatherly things. We'd try to do manly things too; we'd go to the pub and bring Maureen and Cynthia a Babycham or something- a real Liverpool attitude. One Bonfire Night that we had at my place, John and I decided to show our kids (they must have been two and three) some fireworks. We went and bought all these fizzy ones. We'd smoke a lot of herbalized stuff so we didn't want anything really loud. We were doing this whole set up and sitting around, relaxing a little and we went outside to give the babies this big show and everything we bought just exploded! Exploded! What the kids must have thought, I don't know because the grown-ups were going 'Ow! Ow! Aaaagh!' We were so shocked we had to go back inside. And that's what makes our children what they are today."
Ringo Starr, from his book Postcards from the Boys, 2004

"Cynthia and Maureen were the closest, partly because they were Liverpulians in exile and had this additional bond, but also because Pattie often bowed in and out of the circle to undertake modeling commitments. Jane Asher was a very occasional fourth participant but this was a country-based girlie group and townies like Paul and Jane didn't fit into the pattern. All three women were unashamedly fans of The Beatles and would often ring my office to find out about forthcoming tour or recording dates rather than pressing their partners for the details. When Cynthia, Maureen, and Pattie got together it was usually in the kitchen, for many cups of tea or coffee if it was middle of the day or several bottles of win if it was the afternoon. There were two main types of topic for discussion among this close-knit clique: family gossip that circulated solely within The Beatles' own tight inner circle and the wider issues that arose from sometimes scandalous rumors that was rife among the group's fans. I saw this group as the glue that helped to hold The Beatles' marriages together at least for the time being. To share happiness and sorrow, success and disappointment, was a good way of patching up the cracks as soon as they appeared. As part of such a warm and secure little group they felt more at ease than if they had been dealing with the traumas and crises of their extraordinary lives on their own. But for the sharing of information on the perks, pitfalls, problems, and sheer insanity of successfully partnering a Beatle, the womanfolk might have teetered on the brink of despair or simply broken free even sooner than they did. It is to their credit that these faithful first partners kept their lives so private over the years. The media would have agreed to almost any conditions to get their individual stories, but I was never allowed to fix any interviews or photo shoots for the women other than at general photo calls for show business functions or exclusive pictures to mark weddings and births."
Tony Barrow 

"I loved Maureen, she was down to earth, honest, and if she had known of Ringo's infidelities while she was in Liverpool, I wouldn't have reckoned much to the chances of the girl or girls in question if she had found out. She was madly in love with Ringo and would have fought tooth and nail with anyone who had the nerve to try and take him from her. Ringo knew this, of course, and must have been a panic many times in case of in discreet gossip or thwarted lady friends telling all. As it happened, Ringo was lucky enough to get away with it in the face of incredible odd and loyal friends... Maureen was really incredible with Ringo, especially when the boys were recording until the early hours of the morning. Instead of going to bed, she would wait up until the morning. I, on the other hand, would spend all morning trying to keep the house quiet in order that John could sleep until the usual two o'clock in the afternoon. I would then creep upstairs and serve him breakfast in bed with tea and the newspapers. They really were cosseted at home."
Cynthia, from her book A Twist of Lennon, 1978

"Far from being a shy little thing, Maureen was talkative, full of laughter and great fun: we all liked her enormously and thought she was good for Ringo. John and I were delighted when they came to live close by. Initially they'd live in Ringo's one-bedroom flat in Montagu Square, close to London's Hyde Park but, like us, they needed more space and greater privacy. All the Beatles' women got on with each other, but Maureen, who was one of the most down-to-earth, honest people I ever knew, became my closest friend. After their son Zak was born in September, seven months after the wedding, she and I used to go up to Knightsbridge to shop. Anthony [the Lennons' chauffeur] would drop us off and we'd do the rounds of Harrods, Harvey Nichols, and the designer shops in between, then stop for lunch in a smart little bistro. We'd buy cute little outfits for our sons and we were always on the lookout for something different of special for the men. We loved to surprise them with a psychedelic shirt, a piece of ethnic jewelry, or I would buy John a new plectrum for his guitar... Much as Maureen and I enjoyed our outings, she always made sure she was home for Ringo when he came in. Such was her devotion to him that she would stay up sometimes until four in the morning to greet him with a home-cooked meal. She wanted him to feel loved and care for and, like me, she had been brought up in a family where women did the caring and nurturing while men provided. We often went over to their house and hung out with them; it was always party time at the Starkeys'. Ringo was gregarious and fun loving, a clown and a joker with an infectious laugh. Together, he and Maureen made an irresistible double act, both extroverted and uninhibited. Ringo had installed a replica pub in the front room, which he called the Flying Cow. It had a counter and till, tankards, mirrored walls and even a pool table. He'd nip behind the bar to serve us all drinks while Maureen supplied us with endless plates of food. It was a cozy, comfortable house with what felt like the ultimate luxury at the time: a TV- usually switched on- in every room. They had large grounds, in which Ringo had built in a go-cart track. He and John would race the go-carts or play pool while Maureen and I chatted over a cup of tea or took Zak and Julian for a walk. Ringo's other passion was making his own short films. He had lots of equipment and loved to experiment, so after the nanny had taken over Zak and Julian we'd watched his latest movie. One was a fifteen minutes study of Maureen's face. Innovative, perhaps, but not the most riveting entertainment."
Cynthia, from her book John, 2005

I suppose the "last" time Cynthia and Maureen saw each other as Beatles Wives is between after Cynthia and John returning from India and before Cynthia going to Italy where she received news her marriage ended. Cynthia have often said no one (except Paul McCartney) reached out to her - it's believed they didn't want John's wrath on them. Sounds ridiculous, yet it can happen (I know some people like that), John did have a temper. Okay, so, the silence didn't last long. I don't know how... for all I know Cynthia and Maureen ran into each other at a train station. Or restaurant. Or a mutual friend's house. Whatever it was, by August 1970, they were reconnected. After Cynthia and Roberto Bassanini got married at the end of July 1970, they decided to celebrate a housewarming celebration in their home. John and Yoko came, as did George Harrison, Pattie Boyd, Paul and Linda McCartney, and Ringo and Maureen. I'll discuss more of this party on another day, but the thing is that from this point on Cynthia and Maureen's friendship was solid. 

"Just as I was bedded down, Maureen phoned from London. She'd been trying to reach Cyn to wish Julian a happy birthday but we'd been out almost the whole night. Their telephone conversation took off from the 60s as if it were just yesterday. (Cyn wears a diamond ring given to her by Maureen, which she wears with her father's wedding band, and a cameo.) This is when I learned Ringo and Barbara would be married April 27th in London. Cyn and Mo are the best of friends and it's through their friendship that Zak and Julian met, though the miles apart make seeing each other difficult. Maureen managed to get Julian a gold key to the London Playboy Club for his birthday!"
Rita Hansen, 1981 

"I still keep up with Maureen and Pattie occasionally. But I don't see the others."
Cynthia, 1988 

"On and off when we're in the vicinity. It's so difficult to catch anyone. If I'm here in London, Maureen's in Los Angeles, and Pattie's somewhere else!"
Cynthia, 1991

Maureen and Cynthia at the Mayfair Suite of the Hanover Grand in London attending the launch party for Grapefruit on January 19, 1968.

Ringo and Maureen got divorced in July of 1975 (separated since late Summer of 1974) - in divorce papers, Nancy Andrews was named as the adultery reason but off the books it was really Maureen's affair with George Harrison. Whatever rage Ringo may have felt with one of his best friends with his wife, he certainly went out of his way to be the one to get blamed publicly in order to protect Maureen; Ringo didn't want their three children to hate her and, well, can you imagine the press? Especially the fans? Personally I think the fans hold more of a grudge than the person who actually experienced the situation. Look at what happened with George Harrison/Pattie Boyd/Eric Clapton saga. Could you imagine the dirt the media and fans would've frenzied over two Beatles and a wife triangle? It probably still thrive as it does for Eddie Fisher/Debbie Reynolds/Elizabeth Taylor about 60 years ago and all three have passed on. Both Maureen and George have passed on, and obviously whatever happened got buried and they moved on: George got together with Olivia, Ringo eventually with Barbara Bach, and Maureen with Isaac Tigrett. Ringo, despite his hurt and pain over his marriage, continued to protect Maureen and for that I will always admire him. Ringo and Maureen remained connected until her death - which I'll get to momentarily. Anyway, back to Maureen's relationship with Cynthia! In December of 1980, Cynthia traveled to London on business from North Wales and stayed with Maureen. As I already posted before, Ringo called Maureen with the news, and she woke up Cynthia to tell her that John had been killed. Maureen accompanied Cynthia to North Wales and offered her home to Julian as shelter to get away from the press. In 1982, Maureen and Zak attended Julian's birthday party and in 1989, Maureen was a frequent customer at Cynthia's short lived restaurant, Lennon's. As I mentioned earlier, Cynthia attended Maureen's wedding to Isaac in 1989. I know there were certainly a lot more gatherings than I counted.
Unfortunately, I don't know when Cynthia and Maureen last saw each other. In May of 1994, Maureen collapsed at Isaac's House of Blues restaurant opening and was soon diagnosed with leukemia. I know Cynthia saw Maureen during those months, but the details are very vague. Maureen died on December 30, 1994 in Seattle where she was receiving treatment with Isaac, children Zak, Jason, Lee, and Augusta, her mother Florence, and her ex husband Ringo at her bedside. After Maureen's death until her own in April of 2015, Cynthia expressed quite frequently (mostly at Beatle conventions) how much she missed Maureen. Maureen was 48 years old.

"We've shared life's ups and downs. With the Beatles, and without. I was staying with her when John was killed. But Maureen did not live in the shadow of the Beatles." 
Cynthia, 1994 after Maureen’s death

"I've kept many of the friends John and I had in our Liverpool days and mourned others. Maureen, Ringo's ex-wife and a dear friend to the end, died of leukemia when she was only forty-seven. Only a few years earlier, we had been at her wedding to Isaac Tigrett, owner of the Hard Rock Cafe. Both Isaac and Ringo were at her bedside when she died, with her three children by Ringo and Augusta, the daughter she had with Isaac."
Cynthia, from her book John, 2005

Maureen and John boarding on a flight from London to Austria for The Beatles' second film, 'Help!' in Spring of 1965

As for John and Maureen's relationship? I tend to think of it as brother-sister type relationship. I don't believe there was an affair (there's a claim that John had affairs with Cynthia's closest friends) ever between them. Once John got together with Yoko, a wedge of divide struck and they started to hang out less and less. No drama or anything, Yoko and Maureen did get along but I wouldn't call them besties. They famously sat next to each other on the rooftop concert on January 30, 1969. Maureen has had her own fair share of Apple meetings with The Beatles, Allen Klein, lawyers, Linda, and Yoko. Honestly I think Linda and Maureen were closer at that brief point. In October of 1971, Ringo and Maureen went to New York to celebrate John's birthday with Yoko and Neil Aspinall. By then, John already abandoned England and would never return (not to sound horrible about it as John did plan to return to his home country before he died so he did intend to return). In December of 1974, George Harrison was in New York for his Dark Horse tour at Madison Square Garden. John was supposed to join him on stage, but it never worked out. Anyway, Chris O'Dell invited Maureen over from London and stayed at the same hotel as George (with his new girlfriend Olivia Arias), Chris, as well as John and May Pang. According to Chris (and my own perspective), Maureen seemed anxious and nervous to see John. Maureen and Ringo's marriage was in the divorce process by this time, probably was the first time Maureen saw John and George without Ringo. Chris went to get Maureen a drink from the hospitality room where George and John were and a little later stopped at Chris's hotel room to say hello. They reminisce. I believe this may have been the final time John and Maureen saw each other. 

"I was married from before The Beatles left Liverpool, that never made any difference. Cyn didn't have a career like Yoko does, but Pattie had a career - that never upset it. Maureen is a fantastic artist in her own right as well, apart from bringing up that tribe of Ringo's. She also is an artist, and it is nothing to do with wives."
John, 1971

"John is the funniest person you’d ever want to meet. You could never know when he was being serious. That’s John for you!" 
Maureen Starkey, 1988

I already covered John's death, how Cynthia and Maureen were together at the time. Maureen accompanied Cynthia to North Wales and made herself busy by making tea. A few months later, on April 27, 1981, Ringo remarried to Barbara Bach. Despite being in a serious relationship with Isaac Tigrett for some years already, Maureen started to have a nervous breakdown: her hair started to fall out.

"I was always very close to John, then I heard on a newsflash that he'd been shot. I couldn't take it in at first. I was in a state of shock. I went into trauma, and my hair began falling out. First it was small handfuls, then huge lumps. It looked as though I'd go bald." 
Maureen Starkey, 1985

"Nothing we did seemed to help her, and she was continuing to loose her hair. So I flew to Southern India, and my guru gave me a special medal and told me to go straight back to Maureen with it. Just fourteen hours later, I placed it around her neck and immediately she felt better. Within days her hair was growing back."
Isaac Tigrett, 1985

Ringo and Maureen celebrating with John on his birthday, October 9, 1971, in Syracuse, New York

Friday, February 4, 2022

The Two Mrs. Lennons

"Yoko leads her life which is extraordinary and I have mine how I like it .... ordinary."
Cynthia, 1995
Yoko and Cynthia at Julian's Timeless photography exhibition opening at the Morrison Hotel Gallery on September 16, 2010 in New York City

Let me start by reminding my blog readers, new and old, that I have absolutely no intention of making this blog "anti Yoko". While it may seem like it is, and, granted, I have had my own share of misgivings about Yoko; but as I'm getting older, it's hardly worth the trouble. I don't hate Yoko, but I do wish she and John would've handled things differently, especially when it came to Cynthia and Julian's place in John's life, as well as Yoko's, to be like a blended family. Also, this particular entry post is about the relationship between Cynthia and Yoko; I already posted Yoko's relationship with Julian, and there will be more in the future of certain events and topics. 
Aside from their relationship with John and being a mother to his son, Yoko and Cynthia were as different as could be, yet very similar as well. Yoko was from Tokyo, Japan; her family were very wealthy, were neighbors with Emperor of Japan. Cynthia came from a working middle class family in Blackpool, near Liverpool. Although both were artists, their artwork couldn't be more different. Another common thing is that they had two siblings, yet Yoko was the eldest of a brother and sister while Cynthia was the youngest of two brothers. Both were born in the 1930s and lived through World War II, but there's a 6 years age difference. 
I think the best way to describe the relationship between Cynthia and Yoko is like mixing oil and water together - it's hard to blend together, always separating. I do believe there had been attempts... but it's nothing like the other relationships of other wives and ex wives: Pattie and Olivia are friends, there's an open communication between them. Similar thing with Maureen and Barbara. I think Heather and Nancy have no relationship whatsoever, however Heather did voiced her approval on Nancy being with Paul and being part of their child's life, so I would conclude they are polite to one another but aren't friends. I can't count Linda in as she died as Paul's wife; she never met Heather and although Linda met Nancy, she wouldn't have predicted that Nancy would later marry Paul. 

Here's a grand total of the known encounters Cynthia and Yoko have had:
1) August 24, 1967 at the Hilton Hotel where Maharishi Mahesh Yogi gave his lecture; Cynthia saw Yoko from a distance. As John and Cynthia were leaving, Yoko jumped in asking a ride home. They were stunned yet obliged, saying nothing during the ride. Before and after this first official encounter, Yoko visited various times at Kenwood, leaving behind jewelry and sending art gifts, including Kotex pad that puzzled Lillian and Cynthia. Cynthia and Yoko rarely encountered during this time. 
2) May 22, 1968 at Kenwood when Cynthia arrived home from Greece with Alex Madras and Jenny Boyd where she found John and Yoko in the kitchen wearing bathrobes.
3) another encounter during the Summer of 1968 when John and Yoko arrived at Kenwood to talk about the terms of divorce with Cynthia... the conversation pretty much went nowhere.
4) another encounter, this time with lawyers, at Kenwood with Pete Shotton welcoming Cynthia. John later told him whenever he tried talking to Cynthia, her lawyer refused the communication.
5) final divorce discussion encounter at Paul's house in London that went pretty much no where and Yoko apologizing not able to make tea.
6) at a London courthouse to sign the divorce documents for finalization before November 8th; that day Cynthia went to the courthouse to end her marriage while John was at the hospital with Yoko who was suffering a miscarriage. 
7) August of 1970 at Cynthia's home during her wedding celebration with Roberto Bassanini. 
8) sometime in late Summer of 1971, Yoko called Cynthia for them to deal with Julian's visits with John but Cynthia refused.
9) after John's death in December of 1980, Cynthia and Yoko spoke about Julian's travel arrangements. Cynthia wanted to come along for Julian, but Yoko refused. 
10) September of 1981 Yoko sent Cynthia a telegram wishing her luck on her Pen & Ink Drawings exhibition at Tower Gallery in Long Island, New York.
11) October 7, 1988 for the Imagine: John Lennon documentary premiere at the National Theatre in New York; after party at the Russian Tea Room.
12) October 25, 1988 for the Imagine: John Lennon documentary premiere at Canon Cinema in London. 
13) August 3, 1989, Cynthia went to The Dakota where Yoko lives to discuss the John Lennon tribute concert Sid Bernstein was organizing (more about this subject another post). That same night was Julian's concert at the Beacon Theater and an after party at Hard Rock Cafe. 
14) December 12, 1991 at Aunt Mimi's funeral. Cynthia attempted to talk to Yoko about the house John intended to give to his sisters while Yoko asks Cynthia for mother advice on a teenage boy. Afterwards, Cynthia wrote to Yoko regarding the home for Julia and Jackie.
15) June 30, 2006 in Las Vegas, Nevada for The Beatles Cirque du Soleil LOVE show premiere.
16 and final encounter) September 16, 2010 at Julian's Timeless photography exhibition at Morrison Hotel Gallery in New York City.

Here's a collection of quotes mostly by Cynthia: 

"I met Yoko after I came home on a holiday. But I had seen her before. I met her physically, you could say. She'd been staying the night with John, and I came home and they were there, which was sort of curtains for our marriage as far as all of us were concerned, really. ... I knew there was not a thing I could do about it. Any more than I could do about John taking drugs at the time. There was no way I could have stopped him."
Cynthia, 1985

"We're completely different characters and natures and cultures. I don't actually think he judged our kind of art, he just got involved emotionally and every other way with Yoko. So, I don't think he judged me against Yoko. I mean, I'm an illustrator really and a cartoonist. Then I write. So, it was a completely different kind of scenario. But, he got carried away completely with Yoko and her Imagine Art or Conceptual Art and that's what he followed. I think it was probably nearer to his conceptual writing, if you understand what I'm saying. I think he met his match with Yoko, I mean artistically."
Cynthia 

"Yoko had 10 years and I had 10 years and I would rather have had the 10 years I had than the ones she did. I had the raw talent and the raw human being, before the sycophants arrived."
Cynthia, 2000

“Yes, I have [tried to get along with Yoko]. And there’s a certain point when you stop hitting your head against a brick wall. The reason I did it was that there are two boys there, Sean and Julian. They’re half-brothers, they have the same father – they should be best buddies, they could really be helping each other, working with each other and enjoying each other’s company, but that wasn’t to be."
Cynthia, 2007

"I think no matter what two people have gone through - divorce, arguments, whatever - that its a tragedy not to be able to talk over things in later life on a nice even keel. It's tragic for Julian - and for me not to be able to talk to John about Julian. He occasionally speaks to his half brother Sean, but its not very often. I communicate with Yoko. But contrary to what the media would prefer to believe, we don't fight. We saw each other last at Auntie Mimi's funeral and it was all perfectly civil". 
Cynthia, 1995

"John kept Yoko up to date on all the arrangements. After one call, he hung up and said, 'You know Cynthia's still in love with me. She'll do anything to get me back.' 'John, you and Yoko haven't seen Cynthia in four years. Are you mind readers? How do you know what's going on in her head? And even if it's true, what can she do to get you back if you don't want to go? What are you worried about?' John shrugged and tried to laugh it off, but it was quite clear to me that he was still under Yoko's spell, and she had chosen, for some mysterious reason of her own, to get him agitated and upset about Cynthia. Even I, in my vulnerable position, recognized before I met her that Cynthia meant John no harm.
Nevertheless Yoko kept working at it. The next day, after one of her phone calls, John repeated what he had said the day before. Again I tried to joke him out of it, but he kept repeating those ridiculous statements, and every time he repeated them he grew more anxious about the visit and more convinced that he did not want to see Cynthia. I think at that point more than any other I began to fear the power of Yoko's influence over John: To turn John against Cynthia was to make sure that John would never see Julian."
May Pang, Loving John, 1983

"The world is certainly bigger than two women who loved the same man."
Cynthia, 1990

"Realistically it's about what you'd expect. We have spoken over the years. We have stood together and watched our two boys on stage. We are both part of John's family."
Cynthia, 1990

For the most part, Yoko has kept mostly mum on the subject of Cynthia. I couldn't find too much of anything with the exception of other subjects I've covered in the past and continue in the future. My opinion on their relationship was ... complicated. It was clear from the start - before John fell in love with Yoko - that these two would never be friends. I don't think there was hatred between the two women, I do think the negativity part got dramatic and exaggerated by the press and fans. I do believe Yoko downplayed John's love story with Cynthia to nothing but an obligation, as did many others. I also believe there was a part of Yoko's mind that was threatened by Cynthia, perhaps knowing if John and Cynthia spoke friendly terms something could've re-sparked their romance? Why else insisting that Yoko talked to Cynthia about Julian's welfare instead of John? If Yoko was confident that John loved only her, why go through the painstakingly trouble of driving a wedge between him and his ex wife and son? Did she really want John all to herself? Okay, I don't want to dwell on this, so I'll conclude this post with this:
After Cynthia died in 2015, Yoko released two statements (already posted! Check the labels over there ➡ on the blog, like 2015 or Yoko) and, to me, they sounded very genuine and heartfelt. I do believe Yoko looked up to Cynthia while raising a teenage boy during the 1980s, early 1990s, as a single mother. Maybe Yoko did admire Cynthia more than we know, or even SHE realized?