Dingy Boat Ride

Photographed by Peter Sandeman, a neighbor of John's Aunt Mimi, in 1967. 

More than likely taken during this visit: a previous post Visiting Mimi (or check the Labels ➡ Bournemouth). I always thought this picture was taken in Greece, however, after doing a little bit of research on Peter Sandeman, it appears to be Bournemouth. Peter has fond memories of taking John and Cynthia on boat rides and having picnics when they (or John alone) visited Mimi.

Visiting Mimi

At some point in 1967, John and Cynthia went to visit John's Aunt Mimi and, I'm guessing, went to visit Mimi's friends. These photos were taken at Salterns Way, Lilliput, Sandbanks, which is about 15 minutes away from Mimi's home in Poole. In between John and Cynthia is the friend and probably former neighbor of Mimi's. The man on the far right is (probably) Peter Sandeman and his fiance is the woman on the far left side.

I wish there was more information, yet it's nice to see John and Cynthia out and about, visiting friends, especially during the time when their marriage was starting to be troubled. 

Visiting

Cynthia visiting John in Bournemouth during The Beatles tour on August 22, 1963, one day before their first anniversary. 

I love how John was reaching over for Cynthia’s hand. There are other related photos here on this blog already posted (to be honest, I don’t like posting the same thing twice... although sometimes it does happen).

Volume III: Life with Aunt Mimi

"She was friendly but cool. Regal, almost."

Cynthia

"I think that I was probably the successor to Aunt Mimi in John's life."

Yoko Ono

A postcard (front and back) sent by Aunt Mimi Stanley Smith from her holiday in Florence in 1966 to John and Cynthia at their Kenwood home in Weybridge, Surrey. 

Source: The Beatles Memorabilia: The Julian Lennon Collection 2010

I don't know how often Mimi visited John while he was living in Weybridge. I know she definitely did. She was certainly there in the Summer of 1965 when John brought her a new house in Bournemouth (there's a post already done). Once the money started to roll in, John gave weekly allowances to his mother-in-law Lillian Powell and his Aunt Mimi; somehow Mimi found out and was furious as she didn't feel that Lillian should get such a thing but John just shrugged it off. It was his money, after all. Then came 1968 and John's domestic life changed.

John introduced Yoko to his Aunt Mimi around June of 1968 when it was clear that he and Cynthia were over. He brought along Yoko to the home he bought his Aunt in Bournemouth.

"He had rung to say he was bringing someone down. He came in all bright and breezy -typical John- and she followed behind. I took one look at Yoko and though, 'My God, what is that?' Well, I didn't like the look of her right from the start. She had long black hair, all over the place, and she was small- she looked just like a dwarf to me. I told John what I felt while she was outside, looking across the bay. I said to him, 'Who's the poisoned dwarf, John?'"

Mimi Smith

"I thought she was beautiful, so tall and slim, with beautiful skin and bone structure. When John went to the bathroom and left us alone together, Mimi told me how she's brought him up to be very good mannered, and always stand up when a woman came into the room."

Yoko Ono

During the visit, Mimi talked about the Duke of Windsor being at one time popular but lost it all when he left the royalty behind when he married Wallis Simpson, comparing John and Yoko to them.

"John just laughed. He laughed it off, but he knew I didn't like her and he knew I was a good judge of character. I couldn't see what he saw in her and I thought it was wrong and nothing good would come to it."

Mimi Smith

After Cynthia's divorce from John, she and Julian didn't see Mimi until 1972 at Harrie's funeral. At one point, Mimi approached Cynthia to scold her about the divorce: Cynthia should've fought harder for John and their marriage from Yoko. Mimi felt that John and Yoko were making fools of themselves but Cynthia was powerless- what John wanted to do, he does it. Cynthia promised Mimi that she and Julian will visit her… I don't know if that happened or not. I believe that they definitely saw each other again at Mater's funeral in 1976. 

Yoko and Sean outside of Mendips in Liverpool where John grew up in January of 1984

When Sean was born, the first call John made was to Mimi. During her last conversations with John, he promised his Aunt that he'll see her when he planned to visit England as well as the rest of the family to meet his son Sean. He hadn't really seen Mimi since he left England for good in 1971. They last spoke on December 6, 1980. Unfortunately, John was murdered. Mimi originally heard from Neil Aspinwall who called her but he was crying too much to barely speak. I did hear that Yoko called Mimi to confirm the news, including to Julian and Paul McCartney.

Mimi didn't meet Sean until 1984, the only time. Sean had been begging both parents to go to England- John was gamed. Yoko finally took him to England to show him John's home country. Mimi adored Sean.

As for Julian, it's hard to really say but there was a time in the 1980s that Julian briefly lived with Mimi in Bournemouth (it must've been after 1983 when Mimi said that Julian doesn't keep in touch) I don't recall where I read that nor do I know if it's true or not. After Mimi discovered that John never transferred her name as the owner of her home and realized that Yoko was now her "landlord", Mimi was not happy about that but also feared that Yoko would send someone over to check on her so she swapped the photos of Julian to Sean's. Despite that, I do believe that Mimi was more closer to Julian than to Sean in a sense... But, I also believe that Mimi and Julian weren't close at the same time… do you get what I am trying to say? I suppose what I am saying is that there was more accessible contact between Mimi and Julian than she had with Sean. Mimi was there when Julian was born, she literally watched him grow up while Sean was born and grew up without her there on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean. As she did with John on his budding music career, Mimi did the same thing with Julian's music career in a disapproving way. If alive today, no doubt that Mimi would be the same with Sean's musical career.

"It's difficult- I don't remember too much about Mimi. I remember her house, the outside of it. She used to have on the driveway there was a tarmac with white pits in it, I recall that and it was by the sea, I think. I remember Dad used to have, like, a stretch Mercedes, white one, which we used to go to visit her in. But apart from that, I couldn't tell you much more. He used to talk about her a lot, not to me in general but he used to talk about her. If I was in the room, I'll be listening. No [contact], because I don't know, I didn't really, I don't know, but I guess I didn't really feel a part of that. I was just dragging along going to be seeing this relation to Dad so to speak. I don't remember there being a closeness. I mean, there might have been there but I don't recall."

Julian

"I have to admit Yoko was a good wife and mother and, thank goodness, I told John so long before. Sean is a darling, he's the living image of John. He has his mannerisms and his sense of adventure. We are very good friends. He tells me what he's been up to and I tell him all about his dad. He's very interested and can't discover enough. When he's twenty-five he'll be a very rich man, but for now he needs a good education. Yoko is a sensible girl and is seeing to that." 

Mimi Smith, 1983

"I think Julian ought to get a real job. I've heard him sing and it's not my cup of tea. Julian doesn't keep in touch, not that it worries me too much." 

Mimi Smith, 1983

"Sean is like John in every way- looks and manner- and he has got John's sense of humour. His speech, his self-confidence- and he's quite the entertainer! As long as he keeps away from music, he will be alright" 

Mimi Smith, 1984

“Sean got on so well with Mimi, it was great. It was beautiful to meet her again. I had a lovely day - it was really beautiful. I’m glad that I came back here, and I’m glad I showed Liverpool to Sean. We came to Liverpool for Sean - it’s his heritage. We’ve had a wonderful day.“

Yoko Ono, 1984

By 1991, Mimi was very ill with heart problems and had a nurse with her. Her niece Julia notified Cynthia that Mimi's time was winding down so Cynthia reached out to Mimi for peace and closure. From what I understand, it went cordially well. 

"I do not recall Mimi mentioning Sean except in passing. As I said before, she was not fond of Yoko. She did not like being beholden to her for her. Yoko owned her house and paid for all Mimi's needs. Mimi was a very strong person and liked to be in charge. Actually, she always referred to her as that 'Yoko Poko' person. However, Mimi's bark was always worse than her bite and I have a feeling that she may not have truly had as much animosity as she pretended."

Lynn Varcoe, Mimi's nurse, 2011

"I do not remember Cynthia or Julian getting in touch with Mimi during this period. Mimi always spoke well of Cynthia."

Lynn Varcoe,  2011

Mary Elizabeth Stanley Smith died on December 6, 1991. Ironically, the 11th anniversary of her last phone conversation with John; two days before his death anniversary. Her last words were "Hello John". 

Mimi's funeral was held at Poole Crematorium on December 12, 1991. Cynthia attended, accompanied by Julia. Yoko and Sean also attended. As did Julia and John's sister Jacqui. Julian didn't go, he was elsewhere. Paul McCartney, Ringo Starr, and George Harrison sent floral wreaths. Mimi was cremated.

Cynthia attending Mimi's funeral on December 12, 1991

"I went with Cynthia to Mimi’s funeral. When I realized that Mimi was terminally ill, I had tracked Cynthia down to where she was then living, on the Isle of Man. I thought she had a right to know and I gave her Mimi’s phone number, and Cynthia did speak to Mimi, shortly before she died. We took the train to London and stayed in Julian’s flat overnight, leaving early the next morning for the journey to Poole. Most of the family were already in the house by the time we got there, but the door was opened by complete strangers, who told us where to put our coats and where the bathroom was. I was astounded. Who were these people?"

Julia Baird

"Yoko and Sean were at the funeral and so was Cynthia. I remember Cynthia being very upset and crying throughout… After the funeral, we all went to lunch at the Harbour Lights Hotel in Sandbanks. Yoko was very gracious and thanked all the people that helped care for Mimi. She thanked me for being there when Mimi died. Sean was also very polite and attentive to his mother."

Lynn Varcoe, 2011

Yoko and Sean at Mimi's funeral on December 12, 1991

According to Cynthia's book, John, Sean had a lovely time at the funeral… not exactly a thing to say for a funeral, but in that defense, Sean was meeting a lot of relatives he'd never met- probably the only time for some. Yoko tried to mingle but eventually gave up and smoked her long cigarettes, only one maybe two puffs before smashing it out before starting up a new cigarette. Yoko did turn to Cynthia for parenting advice on raising a teenage boy (Sean was 16 at the time).

It was during the funeral that Cynthia used the opportunity on behalf of Julia and Jacqui to confront Yoko about a house issue… but that will be saved for a post on its own.

Bournemouth

A day after the Help! premiere (July 29, so it was on July 30th), Mimi was staying in Weybridge during a visit [don't ask me if Mimi went to the premiere as I honestly don't know], she was with John for his usual late breakfast of his cornflakes. For a time, Mimi refused to leave her beloved Mendips home in Liverpool but was also getting fed up by fans visiting. She then got to the point of wanting to leave. John asked her where she was willing to move to and the first place that flew out of her mouth was Bournemouth. After breakfast, John and Mimi were driven by Les Anthony to Bournemouth to check out houses, especially the ones that look out to the sea. Mimi fell in love with a house that wasn't for sale. So, in his 'weekend' wear of jeans with holes, a shirt, and a cap, John went to the door and convince the starstruck owners to sell their house to him… they did! Few sources, including Cynthia, say that it was indeed on the market and it was the fourth house they looked over that won Mimi's approval. Mimi happily moved in by September of 1965 and remained there until her death in 1991.

There's a known record of two times that John, Cynthia, and Julian visiting… well, actually three minus Cynthia. Although according to Cynthia, she thought only once but, sorry Cyn, pictures don't lie.

The first visit was in 1965 after Mimi moved in… unfortunately I don't know the exact date but let's say in September after she settled in, while it was still summer and the beach was full of people. John understandably didn't want to be recognized and wore a big hat. Luckily for him, he wasn't bothered at all. So far, no photos are publicly available, if taken. Mimi, John, Cynthia, and Julian had a picnic on the beach, swimming, and playing in the sand. 

"When we bought her the house down in Poole in 1965, we went to visit and she was all over him then, but apart from that there was no contact."

Cynthia, 2005

Again, sorry Cynthia, there were more contact than she either realized/didn't know or had forgotten about.

Julian in Bournemouth, 1966

(top) Julia Baird's collection

(bottom) Yoko Ono's collection [perhaps photographed by John?]

John and David hanging out on Mimi's balcony in Bournemouth, 1966

From Julia Baird's collection

The second visit was in 1966. Again, unknown date. However, this time around it was a family gathering. John, Cynthia, Julian, sisters Julia and Jacqui, Aunt Harrie, cousin David (Harrie's son), those are who I know of were there. 

John, Julian, and Mimi at Sandbanks Ferry, 1967

Photographed by Betty Derrick

In April of 1967, John and Julian went to Bournemouth to visit Mimi (where was Cynthia? I don't know… could be somewhere with her mother Lillian) and they took Sandbanks Ferry to Studland and Shell Bay.

Those times weren't the only times John visited- he actually came around quite often when able to where he could get away from being a celebrity and pressures. Even after his divorce from Cynthia, John continued to visit Mimi with Yoko. In fact, while Paul McCartney was marrying Linda Eastman and George and Pattie Harrison were being arrested, John and Yoko were with Mimi and decided that they were going to get married. In 1972, John and Yoko left England for good for New York City and Mimi wouldn't see John again although they did talked on the phone often. After John's death in 1980, Mimi discovered that she wasn't the owner of her beloved house: John was and now Yoko. In fear that Yoko would send her people over to check in on Mimi, she quickly put down display photos of Julian and replaced them with Sean. Wow. That's definitely not a favorable point for Yoko! By the way, Mimi only met Sean once but we will get into that some other time. Cynthia did later started visiting Mimi on occasion. Anyway, immediately after Mimi's death and funeral, her house was sold. It was soon demolished and was replaced with a more modern home. 

First Comes Love, Then Pregnancy

“He used to tell me how he and Cyn planned to settle down and raise a family as soon as the Beatles began to pay off, and how much he missed being without her.”

Pete Best

Cynthia visiting John in Bournemouth during The Beatles tour on August 22, 1963, one day before their first anniversary

1962 was quite a year for John. The Beatles already enlisted Brian Epstein as their manager, he lost his best friend Stuart, got a record deal, The Beatles changed drummers (Pete out, Ringo Starr in), and Cynthia got pregnant over the Summer.

Sometime in July, John returned home from Hamburg and had a regular gig at the Cavern- things were going well for John. Cynthia was still in art college, training as an art teacher, and worked part-time at Woolworth's. But she wasn't doing great financially; her grant money ran out and she needed assistance (welfare). The night before Cynthia was to go for her final exams early in the morning, John came over and, well, they conceived a baby that night! The next morning, Cynthia dragged herself to take her exams. Ironically, the day the results of her exams came in (she failed), Cynthia discovered she was pregnant. She noticed that her period wasn't coming and had morning sickness. Her best friend Phyllis Mackenzie came over for support and arranged Cynthia to see her Doctor. After being examined, the Doctor confirmed the pregnancy and gave Cynthia a stern disapproving lecture… Personally, I don't think it was the Doctor's place to lecture Cynthia like that. It may have been looked down upon to be single and pregnant, but it wasn't any of her business to do that. Her job was to test Cynthia's blood, urine, examine her body, and give the results.

“I finished the course and almost immediately discovered I was pregnant. I said to John, 'You don't have to marry me just because of this.’ John has said quite a few times in interviews that he had to get married, but that isn't true. I gave him the choice, and that isn't widely known. He chose to marry me. If he hadn't, I’d have coped. I’d have had the child and kept it. I’d never have considered adoption. I had no idea then what was in the offing. His career was just beginning in a small way.”

Cynthia, 1976

Before Cynthia told John, she was scared to tell him. She didn't know how he would react and Cynthia didn't want to believe it either. Other than the morning sickness, she didn't feel pregnant, her clothes still fit at that point. Babies were not in Cynthia's mind at all; her knowledge on babies and children were next to zero and figured she would have them later after career and marriage- perhaps after 25 years old, 30 may have been better suited. Not 22, 23 years old. John and Cynthia never used protection, there were no condoms, birth control pills, and other kinds- if there were in existence, then it may have been really expensive and still in experiment testing. They didn't think that pregnancy would ever happen to them. Ignorance was bliss. I know later John would blame Cynthia for getting pregnant, according to Fred Seaman, his personal assistant, making it all her fault to trap him into marriage. Well, guess what, John? It takes two to make a baby and you are 50% of the blame. And I am very sure that Cynthia didn't plan on getting pregnant. It could be John's Macho attitude, drugs alternating his memory or selective, and of course, Yoko. But let's set this aside for another post down in the future for discussion- let's focus on what was happening in 1962. Although John and Cynthia knew how babies were made and were both taught that if boy gets girl pregnant, they get married. Cynthia gave John an option to not marry her, to go off and not be involved while she would face the consequences of being outcasted.

“I became pregnant because nobody told me how you did it, or rather what you did about it.”

Cynthia, 1999

“I was 22 and John was 21 when we got married. I was pregnant at the time. I didn't know anything about birth control. Neither of us were thinking about the consequences. When we found out, we just said, 'Oh my God, what are we going to do?’ If he’d said at that point he wasn't ready for marriage, I would have accepted that. I wasn't out to trap him. I mean, it ruined my career at college- I was taking my NDD, my teacher's diploma. His career started and mine finished. If I hadn't met John and got married, I would have been an art school teacher or gone into the commercial art world.”

Cynthia, 1988

“I didn't know if John would want to get married. I didn't want to tie him down.”

Cynthia, 1968

“I was a bit shocked when she told me. But I said, ‘Yes, we’ll have to get married.’ I didn't fight it. I went in the day before to tell Mimi. I said Cyn was having a baby, we were getting married tomorrow, did she want to come? She just let out a groan.”

John, 1968

Hmm not really… John probably condensed it and made it sound 'whatever’ innocent than to what actually happened. We now know by a few accounts (Cynthia, Julia, maybe one or two other) that Mimi knew longer than less than 24 hours of the wedding. Not sure how long though. In Ray Coleman's Lennon book, John told Mimi the same day Cynthia told him. Needless to say, Mimi did not take the news well. According to what John told Cynthia, she threw things at him, yelling and so forth. Mimi decided to boycott the wedding and… whoa I am jumping ahead of myself! Let's take a few steps back on the moment Cynthia told John that he is going to become a Daddy. The many times Cynthia recounted the story, she was crying while sharing the news and his face turned white. Inside his mind, John was panicking but reassured her not to worry: they will get married. John didn't demand abortion, I don't think it occurred to him. In those days, abortion was dangerous and rare. Although I do wonder what he thought when Cynthia told him that they didn't have to marry and he can break up with her? But one thing for sure, I have to admit, it was a bad time. He did have the option to walk away, yet later on, John made it sound like he HAD to, like an obligation or someone holding a gun to his head (bad metaphor, I know). Maybe he wanted it to sound like he was cornered? As I mentioned earlier, according to Fred Seaman, John detested Cynthia as he felt she purposely got pregnant; there were no drink (despite John saying Julian was a product of the whiskey Saturday night- get into that insensitive comment later in another post), no drugs, no plan, no seduction, no influence, no rape. But that wasn't the bad timing, that happened later during the Yoko years. It was bad timing because John was at the verge of becoming the biggest thing since Elvis Presley and sliced bread and Cynthia was so close of finishing college and start full time on her career. John told Brian the news, he was supportive enough to arrange the wedding but I don't think Brian was thrilled. Brian felt that a married Beatle for teenage girls to swoon over was bad for the image. The wedding and marriage would have to be kept secret. We’ll get more into that in another post (tired of me saying that? So much to get into, so many layers of their story!). Around that time, Cynthia's mother Lillian came to England for a visit. Cynthia was scared to tell her mother and waited until the night before she left to let her know that she will be a Grandmother. She figured she didn't want to ruin her mother's visit. However, Lillian turned out to be supportive as these things do happen. Lillian thought of cancelling her ticket but Cynthia told her not to: Lillian save a long time for her ticket and she can save for another ticket to see her first grandchild. The next day after Lillian's departure was the day Cynthia became Mrs. Lennon. As mentioned a little while ago, Mimi was not thrilled. She encouraged the family not to attend his wedding (or else you will receive Mimi's wrath) and enlisted her sister Nanny to persuade John not to marry Cynthia. Mimi (and Nanny) thought Cynthia could move to Canada to be with her mother and have the baby there- out of sight, out of mind. But John wouldn't have any of that.

“I do remember John being told he didn't have to marry Cynthia, who’d become pregnant. So here another family baby was being called into question. If John had shown any doubt, I think the family might well have closed ranks around him. But John’s certain reply was, 'I’m going to marry her. I want to marry Cynthia.’ Of course, he did- she was beautiful, they both had with and, as artists, shared a common creative talent. But marriage, I think, was not thought quite the image for a group idolized by teenagers and, on Brian Epstein's instructions, it was therefore kept very low key. Jackie and I weren't allowed to go to the wedding, though we knew about it.”

Julia Baird

An early acceptance of Mimi's attitude towards the pending wedding was that she gave John the money to buy Cynthia a wedding ring. He took Cynthia to a jewelry store where she picked a ring she wanted.

There's a story that Mimi told relatives, it's in Ray Coleman's book Lennon as well, that John sat down and cried, confessing that he didn't want to get married the night before the big day. Reality must have hit him hard. It is a big step, no question. After he found out about the pregnancy until his breakdown moment, John presented a supportive, encouraging, and determined to get married front in Cynthia's company. They would joke about being elderly married couple. But to others, John told them he had to to protect Cynthia and the baby. I can't really blame him for his insecurities and views about marriage and family. His family history did not have the greatest track record, John's music career was starting to get hot and on demand, I am also sure that Stuart's death was still heavily on his mind. Plus, he was 21 years old. When I was 21, I knew full well that I wasn't ready to marry and settle down, become a parent, despite I had nowhere near what John and Cynthia were going through. I can only understand the mindset of a 21 year old. If John was being insecure, unsure, scared, denial, not ready, I can understand it. He was probably giving a reason to go through with the wedding and be a Macho man. I do genuinely believe John was in love with Cynthia, he did want to marry her and have children. But not in 1962. Maybe 1964, 1965. To be fair, I am certain Cynthia had her own doubts, especially with motherhood and being a secret wife. She would have to make more sacrifices than John, in my opinion. She had to give up any kind of career in the art world and have her life woven into with John's life and her baby. It's a lot to take in.

“He talked about Cynthia ‘expecting’ and- while I don't remember exactly what he said- I get the clear sense he wasn't happy about becoming a father. I also got the impression he loved Cynthia very much.”

Linda Ness, a friend of John's

“I thought it would be goodbye to the group, getting married. None of us ever took girls to the Cavern, as we thought we would lose fans- which turned out to be farced in the end. But I did feel embarrassed, talking about being married. It was like walking about with odd socks on or your fly open.”

John, 1965

Now while you think 'How dare John to say that!’, just also know that Cynthia completely knew what he meant and agreed with him.

John, why do you have to get married? (Fan question, 1964)

“Because same reason why anybody would get married, you know? Don't be slushy-like, but you do it if you wanna get married, but you gotta go, you gotta go. As I always say.”

Whatever reservations John may have had, he went through with it. He was taking a big risk with his career and he knew it. John also may have not want to repeat the cycle of what his own father did- especially before the baby was born.