Suitcases

 

Sail Away

 

Fashion Show

George Harrison, Alex Madras, Pete Shotton, John and Cynthia went to the Revolution Club in Mayfair, London to watch Pattie Harrison do the catwalk from Ossie Clark and Alice Pollack, who was the boutique owner of Quorum, organized the event. It was on January 25, 1968.

Cosmic Art

Brian is Dead, Long Live Brian 

by Cynthia Lennon in 1978 of Jane Asher, Paul McCartney, John Lennon, herself, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, Pattie Boyd, George Harrison, Ringo Starr, and Jenny Boyd after hearing the news of Brian Epstein's death on August 27, 1967 while in Wales

It’s Very Kind of You, But Not Today Thank You!

by Cynthia Lennon in 1978 of herself refusing spa treatments in Rishikesh, India, 1968

By Cynthia Lennon of Pattie Boyd, herself, George Harrison, John Lennon, and Magic Alex announcing their sudden departure from the Maharishi on April 12, 1968

Fantasy Island

July 22 - July 31, 1967

John and Cynthia sightseeing in Athens 

One day, John decided he wanted to buy an island for privacy. I'm not sure what brought the idea, but it was something that was on John's mind. I'm sure it started on drugs, and fans coming to his Weybridge home. But once he shared this idea to Cynthia, she was sold! 

The idea of paradise where Julian could run around, John and Cynthia could be alone, with no strangers coming to the door... it does sound fantastic! I also find the idea a lovely gesture of John wanting to be with Cynthia, alone and away from the craziness. Eventually, the idea of the Lennons having their private island extended to the other three: Paul, George, and Ringo. 

"Mind you, when it came to odd requests, John gave me the biggest shock. We were at Abbey Road after a recording session and John laid down his guitar, turned to me and said, 'Alistair, I want you to buy me an island.' I thought this was just another example of the customary Lennon banter and responded: 'Fine, John. What'll it be? The Isle of Wright? The Isle of Man? A Caribbean island?' He said, 'No, man. I'm absolutely serious. I need to have a place entirely of my own. I want an island with a fresh water supply and green grass'. And he handed me a piece of paper with an island, fresh water, and grass written on it. This was clearly a plan he had devoted several seconds to preparing. 'I want to build a house on it to get some peace and privacy. Somewhere Cyn and I can go to get away.  Oh, and it mustn't be more than two hours from London,' said John...My instant reaction was that this was yet another Lennon wind-up. The sequence of events was a little too coincidental so I rang Cynthia to see if this was an elaborate John joke. She swore John was not messing around this time. He really did want an island and she liked the sound of their own little Emerald Isle... The Beatles wanted to take a look for themselves and have a holiday into the bargain and I sprang into action to organise it. Alex (Madras) went off to Greece to prepare his father's house in Athens for us and to hire a large enough yacht to accommodate Paul and Jane, John, Cynthia and Julian, George and Pattie, Ringo and Maureen*, Big Mal Evans and his wife, Neil Aspinall, and me."

Alistair Taylor

*Maureen didn't go - she was heavily pregnant with Jason.

"The most magical moment came at dawn. As the sky turned pink and sunlight flooded in, Pink Floyd took to the stage, for the first time wearing velvet flares and tight satin shirts. John was so overwhelmed that in a stoned way he had a vision of his future idyllic life. He came over and said, 'I'm taking Cyn away. We're going to live in Paradise.' He was referring to the island he had bought by auction in remote Clew Bay the previous month, but hadn't yet seen.The next day, John, Dunbar, and Magic Alex flew to Dublin and got into a large black limousine that was waiting for them at the airport, and drove to the lonely West Coast. A local boatman took them from the mainland to John's island. He strode out a few hundred yards of damp heather and spiky sea grass he owned, before huddling out of the wind in the lee of a rock, to make a handful of nonsensical sketches of his future home, with an eye that saw only fantastic pyschedelic visions. He wanted a place where he, Cynthia and Julian would find themselves, be happy and where there would be no deeply intense woman like Yoko to possess his mind. A place from which he would emerge occasionally to make a record or attend other psychedelic happenings. It was a dream that the exposed outlook and the cold winds from the sea blew away. The three intrepid adventurers returned to the madness of London and the island went back to sleep."

Tony Bramwell 

John, Cynthia, Julian, Paul McCartney, Jane Asher, and Alistair Taylor departing London to Athens on July 22, 1967

I don't know the process of buying an Island but I can safely guess that it isn't cheap... but John, and The Beatles, could afford it. Plus, they would have to pay for other amenities, like buildings, renovations, furniture, and care for the island (lawn maintenance, electricity, fresh water supply, food). 

Well, anyway, John and Cynthia decided make a trip to check out potential spots with Paul, George, Ringo Jane, Pattie, and Julian. Plus, Alistair Taylor, Mal Evans, probably his wife Lil, Neil Aspinall, Paula Boyd, and Magic Alex Madras, who was from Greece. I can really picture Alex working his 'magic' on John here - convincing him that Greece is the way to go. I believe this was really the first time John and Julian had a vacation together, and going out of the country. I honestly can't think of any other time John and Julian traveled together beforehand. On July 22, 1967, they set off to Greece and stayed with Alex's family. The following day, the 23rd, there was a storm so their boat trip was delayed. Instead, they went sightseeing and participated in a traditional Greek folk dance in Araxos. They also enjoyed the beach, swimming in the sea. I don't know exactly where they were mainly based- probably Athens, where they were also spotted sightseeing. I bet Alex was their tour guide. They were supposed to see a play Agamemnon hosted by Oxford University Dramatic Society; except Alex alerted news media that The Beatles were in town... why would he do that? Alex should've known that The Beatles didn't want attention while in town. They weren't there to be famous. Sure enough, The Beatles were greeted by the press and weren't able to see the play. This should've been a red flag on trusting Alex. July 24th, the weather was still delaying the boat trip, so, sightseeing they go. The next day, their yacht arrived but the ride was planned to set sail on the 26th; Paul and George decided to stay at "home" while John and Ringo went out to check out musical instruments. I don't know what the others did. On the day of (the 26th), Ringo left before getting on the boat to be with his heavily pregnant wife Maureen with Neil Aspinall accompanying him.  

John, Cynthia, Julian, Pattie Boyd, George Harrison, Ringo Starr, Paul McCartney, Jane Asher, and their entourage party enjoying food and tradition Greek dance in Araxos on July 23, 1967

Now, I heard two different versions on how The Beatles got on a yacht to island-shop: 

1) they rented a boat

2) the boat belonged to Alex's family

What is definitely true is that the yacht was named MV Arvi. The boat had 24 berths and a crew of eight, including the captain, a chef and two stewards. On July 26th, everyone got on board and set sail. The island of interest was Agia Triada. During the boat ride, John, Paul, and George took acid (I don't know about Ringo, he could've and he also left early to go home to his very pregnant wife).

"We rented a boat and sailed it up and down the coast from Athens, looking at islands. Somebody had said we should invest some money, so we thought: ‘Well, let’s buy an island. We’ll just go there and drop out.’ It was a great trip. John and I were on acid all the time, sitting on the front of the ship playing ukuleles. Greece was on the left; a big island on the right. The sun was shining and we sang ‘Hare Krishna’ for hours and hours. Eventually we landed on a little beach with a village, but as soon as we stepped off the boat it started pouring with rain. There were storms and lightning, and the only building on the island was a little fisherman’s cottage – so we all piled in: ”Scuse us, squire. You don’t mind if we come and shelter in your cottage, do you?’ The island was covered in big pebbles, but Alex said, ‘It doesn’t matter. We’ll have the military come and lift them all off and carry them away.’ But we got back on the boat and sailed away, and never thought about the island again." 

George Harrison

"We went on the boat and sat around and took acid. It was good fun being with everyone, with nippier moments. For me the pace was a bit wearing. I probably could have done with some straight windows occasionally, I’d have enjoyed it a bit more. But nothing came of that, because we went out there and thought, We’ve done it now. That was it for a couple of weeks. Great, wasn’t it? Now we don’t need it. Having been out there, I don’t think we needed to go back. Probably the best way to not buy a Greek island is to go out there for a bit. It’s a good job we didn’t do it, because anyone who tried those ideas realised eventually there would always be arguments, there would always be who has to do the washing-up and whose turn it is to clean out the latrines. I don’t think any of us were thinking of that."

Paul McCartney

Paul and Julian in Araxos, Greece on July 23, 1967

Julian and Paul building sand castle while in Greece 

One thing really noticeable during the trip to Greece: Paul and Julian. With John standing there, watching his band mate, co-songwriter, and best friend Paul McCartney playing with his son. Paul played with Julian, always took the time to fool around, giggling, shrieking, swimming, running around, playing Cowboys & Indians, and building sand castles. John definitely took notice, he often did acknowledged the tight bond between 'Uncle' Paul and Julian. I think it's a mix of complimentary and jealousy from John. 

"Paul had a much more tender way with people, and therefore had a greater understanding of handling children. That's how his association with me was tightened. When I was a kid, Dad wasn't necessarily the playing-around type, whereas Paul was, so there was cowboys and Indians and all that kind of stuff."

Julian, 1998

“Paul was definitely the more gentle sort of playing cowboys and indians all the time while Dad was off doing something else. So, he tended to be around a bit more.”

Julian 

“We were once on a Greek island on holiday, and we were on a boat. It was George and Pattie, John and Cynthia, me and Jane Asher, I think. And Julian was along. I played with Julian most of the trip. We’d run around the deck playing cowboys and Indians— ‘bang, bang, you’re dead’, or whatever— and Julian loved it. And I remember John coming up to me… In fact, it was one of the most poignant moments of our relationship. He took me aside and said, ‘How do you do that?’ And I couldn’t tell him. You either know how to do that stuff or you don’t.”

Paul McCartney, 1995

“We’d gone on this Greek holiday once to buy an island and Julian and I spent a lot time playing around on the boat. I used to play cowboys and Indians with him, and he’d love it: a grown-up who would go, ‘Now you chase me, and I’ll chase you, but after you’ve caught me, not before, okay?’ And you were totally in this mad magic game. I remember John coming up to me once and he took me aside and said, ‘How do you do it?’ I said, ‘What do you mean?' He said, ‘With Julian. How do you play with kids like that?’ I remember feeling a wave of sorrow coming over me, like uhh, I’d love to be able to tell you. Then I tried to give like the potted version, you know, ‘Play, pretend you’re a kid. Play with him.’ But John never got it. Never got the hang of it. John was always a man.”

Paul McCartney, 1999

There's footage from The Beatles Anthology of Paul hanging out with Julian and Jane in the sea, Julian sliding on a railing of the yacht with Jane watching over him, and with John smiling at Julian having their own moment. 

I don't know the deep details of the trip for John and Cynthia. In my mind, John and Cynthia were working on their marriage despite the problems... for major example: John was taking acid during the vacation and island-shopping. That must have pissed off Cynthia. She must have dreaded the idea of an Island getaway and John taking acid, like she would never escape from. Other than that, I never heard of any bad tension between them. Cynthia didn't write about the Greece trip in her books or HELLO! magazine installments or spoke about it in interviews, that I'm aware of. 

 

John, Cynthia, Julian, Paul McCartney, Jane Asher, Paula Boyd, and Alex Madras arriving at Heathrow Airport from Athens on July 31, 1967

On July 29th, George, Pattie, and Mal Evans left as George and Pattie were due to travel to Los Angeles on August 1st. On July 31st, the remaining Beatles party departed from Athens to London. The idea of buying an island was pretty much forgotten. Although, I think the idea of having a commune stuck around as Cynthia (and maybe Maureen, Pattie, and Jane) saw Tittenhurst Park while commune house shopping. Unfortunately, as we now know, the commune living never happened. There is something weird that I recently noticed: John and Cynthia were both wearing the same clothes when they left London and when they left Athens. 

Arriving Home From Greece

 

Breakdown on Marriage

“As you and I well know, our marriage was over long before the advent of LSD or Yoko Ono... and that's reality!”

John, 1976

This post list was inspired by what John publicly wrote to Cynthia in 1976 during the time she was doing interviews, particularly with News of the World. I will post the entire letter(s) in full another day but now I want to go over the list of reasons why John and Cynthia's marriage didn't last… Mind you, this is all speculation and my opinions only. You don't have to agree and you are more than welcome to share your own opinions of what went wrong in the comments (just be nice is all I ask). So, let's give John a benefit of the doubt and explore the top 10 possibilities of why their marriage didn't last.

1. John

He was away a lot. Even in town, John was away a lot. He was incredibly busy with The Beatles with recording, touring, partying, photo sessions, the lot. I don't think that's entirely his fault though. I can't even blame Brian Epstein for it. It's just the way of life of a musician in the 1960s. It's not just his lack of absence. There's also his drug-taking, infidelities, his old-fashioned views of being the dominant male and breadwinner of the household. John didn't exactly have the best husband-like figure in his own life as his father wasn't around at all and his beloved Uncle George Smith died when John was 13. There was hardly anybody for him to learn what it took to be a husband. Both Paul and George had their fathers, Ringo had his stepfather to be influenced; John didn't really have anybody. Then there's the in depth level on how much John loved/in love with Cynthia as many many people (except me) have question or came to the conclusion that John was never in love with her. Especially comparing to his overrated love story with Yoko Ono.

2. Cynthia

I like to think that Cynthia didn't have a lot of blame in her marriage breakdown but… it does take two. Well, I think what John was looking for was a partner-in-crime or a dominant partner, or both. I must say and admit that Yoko provided both. Whatever John did, Yoko did too. Whatever Yoko did, John did too. Before Yoko arrived in his life, John did try to get Cynthia to be his partner-in-crime. He wanted a buddy to do drugs with (I don't think Cynthia was wrong on refusing drugs: good for her!) and whatever mischievous ideas he had. But I believe that once Cynthia became a mother, the partnership ended. Cynthia became, in Pattie Boyd's words, more like a mother than a wife. I also don't think Cynthia managed to integrate into the rock and roll style well. Although London may have fascinated her, she was more happier in a small town village. Maureen Starkey had a similar upbringing like Cynthia but managed to blend herself into the entertainment world while married to Ringo Starr and Isaac Tigrett. Cynthia wasn't a partyer, a few are okay but not frequently. Nothing wrong with that (as I am more of a homebody myself) but for John and their marriage, I believe he wanted more pizzazz and surprises; maybe more sex, more mischievous thinking, more fun, to be on his mentality wavelength. After John got hooked on LSD, whatever was left of their partnership started to wind down.

“I don't know. I must have a guardian angel somewhere. I guess it's my boring, down-to-earth attitude that probably sent John running and was the end of the marriage. I see things in black and white rather than grey or colours. It's just my upbringing. I'm a realist.”

Cynthia, 1988

3. Drugs

A big part of the catalyst that broke up John and Cynthia. There will be a post dedicated to drugs so I don't want to dwell over this, so here's a short version: while John was in Hamburg, he was into pills that gave him and the other Beatles an adrenaline rush to play several hours onstage. When Cynthia visited, she took them too but I don't think the pills really agreed with her. In fact, I don't think any drugs agreed with Cynthia. She didn't take well to marijuana as it made her sick but she didn't really objected John using it as it helped him relaxed. I do think Cynthia did her fair share of it or at most had gotten a contact high. LSD frightened them both at first but John decided to explore it more while Cynthia definitely had a bad reaction every time she took it. As mentioned in #2, John wanted a drug buddy in Cynthia, but her body, mind, and self was just not into it.

"When John discovered drugs I lost him. He had decided his path in life and there was nothing I could do about it. He would just take acid every day in the hope of escaping from me, from Julian, from the Beatles. I tried acid twice but it just made me feel sick. My priority was Julian, while John had no interest in responsibility at all."

Cynthia, 2000

4. Infidelities

All through their relationship, John did cheat. Maybe it had been exaggerated on how often… some made it as though John had so many women he barely had time for Cynthia or sleep. Yet early on their relationship, John and Cynthia were very inseparable… only John knows the real story but then again John would say he was a proud dirty man-slut. Whatever how it may have been, John covered it up because he didn't want Cynthia to know about it until he met and eventually got involved with Yoko. Before Yoko, John treated his side pieces like toilet paper. I guess John cheating did screw him to be paranoid towards the end of the marriage as he started to get curious on how Cynthia really behaved during their relationship.

5. The Beatles

I wouldn't say The Beatles were THE blame of the breakdown of the marriage… but, yes … they did ultimately caused the breakdown. Cynthia did seem to understood that she would have to share her man not just with the guys but with the whole world. But that being said, Paul McCartney, George Harrison, Ringo Starr, Pete Best, and Stuart Sutcliffe did like Cynthia and vice versa. On their wedding night, John performed elsewhere. On the time during Julian was born, John was on tour. The Beatles took John away when he really needed to be with Cynthia during these monumental moments. They needed to readjust their relationship as a married parents but it was difficult to do when they were apart with just phones and letters. I do understand that John had no control over the timing and it was his dream to succeed as a musician- Cynthia knew that from day 1. Cynthia did accept it but it couldn't have been easy.

“I lost my first family to do what, make Sgt. Pepper?”

John, 1978

6. Fame

I know that Cynthia yearned more for the early days when John started becoming more successful and well known. She preferred it. I get it: before John was famous, he was around more. Broke, mind you, but honestly, if John was to be homeless, Cynthia would be cozy in a cardboard box next to the highway alongside with him. They went everywhere together: to a park, to shops, to the movies, to wherever they wanted. As John got famous, he would get stopped, mobbed, and chased after so much so that it was impossible to just go outside and explore the city. They couldn't even live in the heart of the city as it was unbearable. It's a high price of fame. Nowadays it may have been different today but celebrities do still have paparazzi and stalkers while the fan-mobbing have scaled back a bit. If John and Cynthia were together in this day in age rather than in 1964, their freedom to go to wherever they pleased would be a lot easier! Unlike with Yoko Ono, John kept his marriage quiet and private. I don't think Cynthia then didn't like the fame part although she did participate in film premieres and travels. There were, and are, perks but fame does come at a price; from divorce, to death.

7. Opposite Directions

Right from the very start of their relationship, John and Cynthia were very different from each other. Like night (John) and day (Cynthia). It even baffled their friends- it wouldn't surprise me if they took bets with how long it wouldn't last. At the same time, being the opposite seemed to have worked in balance. John took in so much joy into seeing Cynthia's shocked reactions over his grotesque and dark humor. Cynthia was very shy while John was sociable (up to a point). They had very few things in common: they lost a parent while aged 17; they were blind without their glasses; and they both enjoy reading. They were also artists, however even that has opposite point of views. John doodled, Cynthia detailed. With drugs, John wanted to explore while Cynthia had bad reactions. With raising Julian, John was tough while Cynthia coddled. I would say that around 1966/1967, John and Cynthia were starting to live two separate lives in one big house to the point of being roomies. They fell into a habit of sleeping in the spare room so one night owl would not wake the other. John was still wrapped up in his Beatle world as well as drugs and weird cronies while Cynthia went out and about with her mother. The opposite attraction may have worked in the beginning but it didn't in the end.

8. Lillian Powell

I don't believe that Lillian's presence helped their marriage one bit. According to Tony Bramwell, Pete Shotton, and many others, John did not like Lillian. Of course, Cynthia tried to downplay it, 'oh yes, they got along for my sake'. At best, it was tolerance. For a better idea of my version on Lillian, think of Marie Barone (played by Doris Roberts) on Everybody Loves Raymond. John would give her money and send her off on shopping sprees just to get her out of the house. John even bought Lillian her own home nearby but that didn't last very long. I do understand why Lillian was around alot: she was very close to Cynthia, her only daughter and baby of her nest; she doted on her first grandchild, Julian; and who would want to leave a luxury apartment or mansion?!? I wish there was some sort of compromise… like, when John was away on tour or in the recording studio, Lillian could be with Cynthia. If John was home, Lillian could be with her two older sons, her friends, travel, be anywhere but Weybridge so John could have peace and quiet with his wife and son.

9. Magic Alex Mardas

Mr. Creepy. That guy is as mysterious as Jack the Ripper. The only little background things known about him was that he was from Greece. I don't know how exactly he met the Beatles other than through art gallery owner John Dunbar (somewhere around 1965, 1966) but he certainly latched onto John. Alex fascinated John with his far-out engineering inventions and ideas but they never seem to work… he tried to upgrade the recording studio in Apple Corps but nobody was happy about it- George said that they had to strip everything off. Perhaps his ideas were ahead of the times but nothing came of it as you don't see Alex on the list of inventors along with Thomas Edison, Eli Whitney, or Benjamin Franklin. The most cringing thing about Alex was his role in the breakdown of John and Cynthia's relationship. I know he had one. Not just the part where he put the moves on Cynthia while she was staying with him and Jenny Boyd… or when he traveled to Italy to tell her John wants a divorce. I believe he encouraged John in his paranoia that Cynthia may be cheating on him and the interest in Yoko Ono. Telling Cynthia her marriage with John was over got Alex a new Rolls Royce and John was Best Man at Alex's wedding to Eufrosyne Doxiadis on July 11, 1968 (even that relationship is a mystery). I don't think he told John to leave Cynthia for Yoko but he was a 'yes’ man who got prizes (including his own electronic laboratory and head of Apple Electronics from Apple Corps) from John. He definitely took advantage.

10. Yoko Ono

No explanation necessary other than what's already been posted.

When the Marriage Ends, Vol. 2

We last left off in June of 1968 when John officially ended his relationship with Cynthia and going public with Yoko. If the breakup was bad to go through, the divorce proceedings is the worst part. Well, let's get this over and done with…

"The truth is that John was always attracted by strong personalities. After Brian's death, he needed someone to organise his life and Yoko, who had a very strong character, assumed that role. She was very sure of herself."

Cynthia, 1990

“Yoko and I were on the same wavelength right from the start, from that first night. That first night convinced me I'd have to end my marriage to Cyn.”

John

Cynthia and Julian on the grounds of Kenwood after John left for good during the summer of 1968. From Cynthia's personal collection.

In June of 1968, John filed for divorce against Cynthia, citing her “adultery” with either Magic Alex Madras or Roberto Bassanini… I think it was mainly Alex. Alex probably exaggerated to John about Cynthia's three days stay with him and Jenny Boyd. Or Alex told John the truth that Cynthia pushed his advances away but both decided to say it happened so that John could say he got jilted and turned to Yoko for sympathy and revenge. John had his squeaky clean Beatle image to protect but it was obvious to everyone that this wasn't the case; it was clear that John could be an asshole. John was very open about his love affair with Yoko, that didn't help with his tarnishing image. Not long afterwards, John and Yoko became gypsies, moving temporary out of Kenwood to Paul McCartney's, then to Neil Aspinall's, before eventually moving in Ringo Starr's bachelor apartment 34 Montagu Square after Lillian Powell moved out… well, after Lillian, Cynthia, and Julian moved out back to Kenwood, Jimi Hendrix briefly lived there and then John and Yoko moved in. I don't know why John decided to let Cynthia back to the house other than for Julian's sake but it was clear that it wasn't going to be her home much longer. Only enough to get whatever items she wanted; it was also the home that Julian ever really had known as he was just a baby in Mendips, the Powell family home, and the Emperor's Gate apartment. Plus, I don't think John could have handled being there as he was trying to create a new home life with Yoko. It was his home with Cynthia- Yoko must have felt awkward with all the John-and-Cyn memories that were attached to the house.

John and Yoko in Abbey Road Studios during The Beatles/White album recording sessions in 1968

Photographed by Linda Eastman (McCartney)

At some point in late June, maybe early July, Paul McCartney drove over to check on Cynthia and Julian… I promise you that I will have an entry solely dedicated to Hey Jude as it deserves its own post… but other than Paul, no one else visited Cynthia and Julian. Not Maureen Starkey, not Pattie Harrison or even Jane Asher. Well, maybe exception of Jane as she too was going through a breakup with Paul. But Maureen and Pattie? I have heard many times over the years that John made it very clear that if anybody in his world- friends, employees, hanger-ons- reached out to Cynthia, they would receive John's wrath. Only Paul rebelled. Probably a way of saying f'off and their partnership was starting to deteriorate on its own. I don't know why the rule 'talk to Cyn, feel John's wrath’ would affect Maureen and Pattie but I guess tensions were running high and The Beatles were struggling to keep it together. Ringo and George probably told their wives that it wouldn't be a good idea. However, I do know that it didn't last a long time until Cynthia, Maureen, and Pattie reignite their friendship. Anyway, let's stick to 1968. John started to bring in Yoko to the recordings and didn't blink an eye or anything whenever Yoko started to voice her opinions on the songs, which did not sit well with Paul, George, or Ringo. For 6 years, the recording studio was the guy domain… sure the ladies would come in to visit but it was rare, not a long visit, and they would leave. But from morning to night, every day? Must have been weird! They barely knew Yoko and she's all of the sudden talking on how the song should be like she was a 5th Beatle band member while love-struck John hung to her every word. They weren't happy and this continued well over a year until the band’s breakup unraveled. However, because if John could bring in Yoko, then Ringo and George could bring in Maureen and Pattie more often and Paul brought in his new girlfriend Linda Eastman. Fair deal.

“At HQ Apple, we only heard bits and pieces of all this as it went down. Most women whose husbands betrayed them, get on the phone and call everyone who will listen and then start at the top of the list again. Cynthia was very shy and very private. As far as I know, the only person she fully confided in was Paul, who made her smile and feel better when he said, ‘Hey, Cyn, how's about you and I get married?’ Paul really lit into John before he sat down and wrote Hey Jude, one of his most beautiful and successful songs, to express his love and sympathy for Julian, who was caught up in the middle. Paul, who believed strongly in the family and in family values, told me that he felt as if it was the Beatles themselves who were heading for divorce, not just John and Cynthia… By now, she was Yoko of Kenwood, much to Mrs. Powell's despair. She told Cynthia to put up a fight; but Cynthia was too upset and frightened of what she had seen in Yoko's eyes, and fled to Italy with Julian. With the press camped all around the house, Kenwood was impossible to live in, so John and Yoko escaped the back way and holed up in Ringo and Maureen's old home when they first came to London.”

Tony Bramwell

John and Yoko at their art exhibition You Are Here at the Robert Fraser Gallery on July 1, 1968

John and Cynthia's only source of communication was Peter Brown during this time and afterwards to organize Julian's visits with John. Cynthia wanted to meet with John face to face to talk. At this time, their lawyers were handling the divorce. But, Cynthia wanted to talk to her soon-to-be ex husband to clear the air, discuss any terms and agreements, Julian, and closure. For awhile, John refused until Peter wore him down 'get it over and done with’. John and Yoko did turn up and the meeting didn't go as well as Cynthia thought it could be. John was icy- cold, accusational, and putting Cynthia in a bad light that she was no angel herself. Well, honestly, compared to John, Cynthia was an angel… she didn't cheat, she didn't get hooked on drugs. Not only the Magic Alex thing, but John assumed Cynthia had an affair with Tom Simcox, an actor, while in India. There was no affair other than Tom asking Cynthia if she had a twin sister; otherwise all their interactions happened in public view and John was ignoring Cynthia anyway. John claimed Tom wrote Cynthia a note that he gave to George but he gave it to John out of loyalty. Cynthia never received this note… she did get curious, what did the note say? I'm curious too… too bad Cynthia and Tom didn't eventually hook up, I would've had loved to see John's reaction to that! I did Google Tom (as I honestly never heard of him) and he's quite handsome, still alive. Well, needless to say, this meeting got Cynthia no where. Cynthia wrote in her book John that they met again in the lawyer's office to sign paperwork but according to Pete Shotton, there was an additional meeting at Kenwood with the lawyers and according to Ray Coleman's Lennon biography, another 3rd divorce meeting at Paul's house. John filed for divorce in June but Cynthia countersue for divorce on August 22, 1968 (a day before their 6th anniversary) citing John's adultery with Yoko. John, probably on advice from his lawyers, didn't fight it as there was evidence that he couldn't hide nor deny. The final divorce meeting was at the lawyer's office to finalize the deal.

“The terms of the divorce were hammered out at a meeting in Kenwood, attended by John and Yoko, Cynthia and Mrs. Powell, and their respective lawyers. Though I was in the house at the time, I once again refused to take part; for all my pleasure in John's newfound happiness, I had grown extremely fond of Cyn over the years, and found the denouement to their marriage more than a bit painful. I did, however, make a point of greeting Cyn and her mother when they arrived for the meeting. Cyn managed a sick little smile, indicating to me that she absolved

me of any blame in the break-up; her mother, by contrast, refused even to acknowledge my presence, and stormed through the door with a fixed scowl on her face. After they left an hour or two later, I asked John how the meeting went. ‘It was total fucking nonsense!’ he wailed. ‘Every time I tried to say something to Cyn, her lawyer would interrupt and say I wasn't allowed to speak to her. I could only talk to my lawyer, who'd speak to her lawyer, and he'd speak to Cyn! Finally, I just said: 'Look, Cyn, just take whatever you fucking want. Sort it out among yourselves, let me know, and I'll fucking give it to you!’’ According to John, however, Mrs. Powell was permitted to forgo the services of Cyn's lawyer when she took it upon herself to tell her son-in-law exactly what she'd thought of him all these years. ‘You lout, you scum, you long-haired Teddy Boy!’ she screamed. ‘I wish my daughter had never laid eyes on you!’

Pete Shotton, 1983

One of the final offers John was willing to hand over to Cynthia was £75,000 because he didn't think Cynthia deserved much… yeah, I disagree with that! Cynthia was with him for 10 years and gave him support, stability, love, a child, a comfort of home, a muse, etc. But, with Yoko there and whispering sweet nonsense in his ears, plus no doubt drugs, particularly now heroin, John was playing hardball. Cynthia eventually got £100,000 as an one-time alimony and yearly child support and school fees of £2,4000 for Julian. A trust fund for Julian was set up for £100,000 but it was to be cut up in half or so if John was to have another child; so, when Sean was born in 1975, both boys’ trust became £50,000 each plus interest. Too bad Cynthia didn't know Heather Mills (who was a baby at the time) who managed to get £24.3 million or so from her divorce from Paul in 2008 after a few years of marriage. While many viewed Heather as a gold-digger because of that, many viewed the opposite of Cynthia as she should've fought for more. Cynthia did get less than Heather, Maureen (who got £500,000 plus child support as well as regular alimony payments), while Pattie got a similar amount as Cynthia's but she was involved with Eric Clapton at the time who was able to provide for her and had a no-fault divorce; I do believe George would've been more willing to provide more to the settlement. Ringo, George, and Paul were more generous to their ex-wives, unlike John. Cynthia realized she was lucky but, in my opinion, not lucky enough. But Cynthia got what she really wanted: primary custody of Julian.

"Everyone told me go for more, but I couldn't do it, I took what I needed and I think it's made me a better person. I would rather be me without the money than Yoko with."

Cynthia, 1999

"The lawyers told me to ask for more but I didn't want to, I loved him."

Cynthia, 2000

John and Yoko leaving Marylebone Magistrates' Court in London on October 19, 1968 after being arrested the previous day for drug possession.

Meanwhile, while recording the White album, managing Apple, doing drugs (heroin was the new favorite), and expecting a baby with Yoko, they were arrested for drug possession. They claimed to have been warned 3 weeks in advance. Because Jimi was in the apartment before them, John and Yoko cleaned the apartment from top to bottom. It was later discovered that the drugs were planted after George and Pattie were arrested the following year but the damage was too late; John would have trouble with his passport/visa and would have to fight tooth and nail to live in the United States. John and Yoko were arrested on October 18th and appeared in court on the 19th. In fear that Yoko could be deported, John claimed sole responsibility. On October 25th, John and Yoko announced their baby news, due in February. How John's arrest didn't affect the possibility of his visitation custody of Julian in court amazes me; I think in today's standards, it would have.

Cynthia outside the divorce court in London on November 8, 1968

Yoko and John in the hospital during the miscarriage of their baby in November of 1968

On November 4th, Yoko was admitted to Queen Charlotte's Maternity Hospital; I guess she was feeling pains and went as a precaution to save their baby. John was at her side all the way, sleeping in the bed next to her until the bed needed to be used so John slept on the floor. They watched on the news of Cynthia arriving and leaving court on November 8th to swore under law that her marriage to John has ended by the judge. Yoko lost the baby boy on November 21st, they named the baby John Ono Lennon II. A small coffin and a secret burial site for the baby. They recorded his heartbeat that appeared on their second album, Life With Lions. When Cynthia heard the news, she was genuinely sorry. It's been said that the unborn baby died due to stress of their arrest… and, I believe more so than anything, Yoko's consumption of heroin. Honestly, I do not think or believe that John and Yoko were ready for the child. Especially in that time period of their lives and their relationships with Julian and Kyoko were fragile enough as it was. There was so much going on then; although I have no doubt that the loss really affected both John and Yoko.

Yoko and John on the grounds of Kenwood after Cynthia and Julian moved out in December of 1968.

Photographed by Susan Wood

As part as the divorce settlement, Cynthia had to move out and get her own place. There was no way that she could have managed to maintain the house with the amount John paid out. It was also too large for her. After Cynthia moved out, John and Yoko moved back in for a few months before settling to Tittenhurst Park after living like gypsies while getting married on March 20, 1969. Yoko's divorce from Tony Cox became finalized in February of 1969 however custody of Kyoko continued to battle until 1972 when Tony and Kyoko disappeared.

"If only he had kept his own house in order, he wouldn't have had to preach peace and love to the whole world. There was always that discrepancy with those who were close to John."

Cynthia, 1999

"I wanted to get away from that house. It had too many memories for me. I took Julian, bought a house in London, and asked my mum to move in with us while the divorce went through. She came at once. She's always been there in times of crisis. But on the day of the divorce I insisted on her staying at home while I went to the court. It was something I felt I had to do on my own. The publicity was terrible. I couldn't move without being badgered. But I must admit some of the press was very kind and said some lovely things about me. Marje Proops wrote a beautiful piece in the Daily Mirror which gave me a great lift, because I was feeling very low and rather frightened about the next step in life, and wondering where I went from there."

Cynthia, 1976

“In mid-February my brother went to India with Cynthia. I heard it on the news… My head was in another space. I had been swotting like mad, then celebrating in the same way. We didn’t have a television and we listened to music rather than the news. When I did finally learn that John and Cynthia were parting I was terribly sad. Cyn had been a part of our lives for so many years, and a friend to me and Jackie. I knew how hard it must have been for her, and I felt so sorry for Julian, who was only five. That November John and Cyn’s divorce came through, and three weeks later John and Yoko released the Two Virgins album, probably best remembered for the two non-virgins on the cover.”

Julia Dykins Baird

"There was nothing basically wrong with my marriage to Cyn. It was just like an amber light. It wasn't on go and it wasn't on stop. I suppose that me being away so much during the early years of our marriage, I never did feel like the average married man."

John, 1968