Did John Loved Cynthia?

That's the one question I have seen often asked. For the most part, certain 'friends’, employees, fans, family, spectators, researchers, and so on would say that John wasn't truly in love until he met Yoko Ono. They were, and still are, an ultimate love story. I don't think so, really. If anybody in the Beatles that's a love story would be Paul and Linda McCartney and/or Ringo Starr and Barbara Bach. If Linda hadn't died, there's no question that she and Paul would still be married today. Both couple were rarely apart; meanwhile, John and Yoko did separate for over a year, both dated and had affairs. I don't doubt that John loved Yoko but I do think that their love story is exaggerated.

As I mentioned before in a previous post, John's love story with Cynthia has been looked upon as an obligation since they got married after she announced a pregnancy. But I do know there is so much more to their story, which will be broken down. No one really thought too deep of their relationship… maybe they (certain 'friends’, employees, fans, family, spectators, researchers, and so on) are too happy with their opinions about John and Cynthia's relationship to not really care about it. I had kinda hoped that Cynthia's death would've opened and woke up new memories that were forgotten and buried deep in their subconsciousness but I have seen little improvement since. But… to be fair… quite a number have been dying out. In the last twenty years or so, there have been deaths from Neil Aspinall, Pete Shotton, Stanley Parkes, Leila Harvey, Tony Carricker, Ray McFall, Sir George Martin, George Harrison, Linda, Maureen Starkey, etc. Some feel that they have told their story enough times and want to focus on more important events. Whatever the case may be, I don't agree.

Sure, John wasn't the perfect boyfriend/husband material- there are moments where I want to slap him!- he did cheat, he did misbehave. There's no denying that. But there's also a reason why John carried on a romance with Cynthia for a few years before pregnancy and marriage. He could have ended it at any time. In fact, there was a break up and it was John who wanted to get back with Cynthia again. There were separations but not the 'we are on a break’ kind. When John toured, he could have fallen for someone on the road. John cheated, but the women were discarded like toilet paper. John obviously felt some sort of strong feeling for Cynthia- he protected her from fame, gangs, and fans as best he could. He saw himself as the breadwinner and Cynthia as his wife and mother. She was his muse, stability rock, friend, someone he trusted, supporter. They were opposites, yet for 10 years they managed to fit and be together.

“I fell in love with Cynthia. It's as simple as that.”

John, 1964

“It was said I never loved Cyn. That's far from the truth. We were young, bigheaded, and got into a physical relationship too soon. Perhaps if we took things slow, we would have made it. I know we would have made it.”

John, 1974

Let Me Introduce This Blog…

Why did I decide to do this blog? That's a good question, considering that I have enough on both internet and personal life going on. The answer is because I have always been drawn to the marital relationship between John and Cynthia Lennon. There is something special in their highly underrated love story that in the previous and future posts to explore, analyze, and record that gets constantly overlooked and brush-off to the forgotten side. John would have probably would have preferred it to be that way as he felt so in the years he was with Yoko Ono (we will get more into that in posts to come). Meanwhile, Cynthia recently passed away so she can no longer defend her love story. Julian, to be fair, barely remembers his parents together as they split when he was five and, honestly, I don't really want him to carry on the burden of defending his parents’ relationship or anything else. John's first marriage wasn't as in-your-face as it was with his second marriage to Yoko. His marriage to Cynthia have been often looked down upon as an obligation loveless footnote in John's life story. But it wasn't. There's something more to it.

I do want to point something out for future references… it is not my intention to use this blog to blame or bash Yoko in any way shape or form. Although admittedly she is not my favorite and it may show in between the lines, I want this blog to be positive and to be more focused on John and Cynthia. To get this off my chest, I am not a fan of Yoko-- her treatment towards Julian is unforgivable. There were better ways of handling their difficulties and if they (John and Yoko) have reconsider everyone involved and be more sympathetic, perhaps my views on her would've been much different. That being said, I have spoken to both of her children Kyoko and Sean in social media, who are nice and gracious. I have seen Sean constantly getting tweets and comments of hatred on his mother, and despite my own feelings of Yoko, I couldn't help but feel sorry for Sean for having to see that. Same with both Heather and Beatrice McCartney who have witnessed their mothers constantly being shat on from the media and fans… I wouldn't be surprised if any of that is partially the cause of why we rarely or never see Heather going to her family events for almost 20 years. At the end of the day, it's really the children who gets the price to pay for witnessing a side of hatred. They know their mothers, we don't. They live with their mothers, we don't. And because of that and because I like to think that I am a nice fair person, that I don't want to spend my time hating that particular person. It is what it is, it was what it was… 

Caught Some Fish

From Cynthia Lennon's Collection

From Ringo Starr's Collection

Home Pool

From Yoko Ono's Collection

Julian and the Stanley Sisters

Exploring the relationship between Julian and his paternal grandmother's sisters.

Mary Elizabeth (Mimi)
Mimi raised Julian’s father John Lennon from the time he was five until he moved out officially at the age of 23, already married and a parent. Mimi’s relationship with Julian’s mother Cynthia Lennon was strained yet tolerable at best; they had good days and days where they wanted to strangle each other. They lived with Mimi after Cynthia had a threatening miscarriage risk so she wouldn’t be alone while John was on tour with The Beatles. While Cynthia was at the hospital giving birth to Julian, Mimi called the hospital for updates and informed John the news when he called to check in. She was also the only family member to go to the hospital to see the baby (before John did)- she was frosty with Cynthia but her face soften when she saw Julian. Mimi hosted a family gathering when Cynthia and Julian arrived home from the hospital by taxi. However, until John, Cynthia and Julian moved out, Mimi helped care for Julian once when Cynthia was exhausted and desperately needed rest. Other than that, Mimi would visit her sister Harret, who lived near by, to complain how Julian cried most of the time and criticized how Cynthia was coping with motherhood. In 1965, John bought Mimi a home in Bournemouth where she remained until her death in 1991. John, Cynthia and Julian visited her not long after she moved in. They went to the beach where residents left John alone. According to Cynthia, that was their only visit… However, with pictures from her sister in law Julia’s collection, it appeared that John, Cynthia and Julian visited again the following year (1966) but with other members of the family present. In 1967, John and Julian had a day out with Mimi on a ferry. Mimi also visited the Lennon family home in Surrey a couple of times; John named one of his cats Mimi after his Aunt. After John and Cynthia divorced, when Mimi saw Cynthia at Harrie’s funeral, she berated her for the divorce and not fighting for John hard enough. Before John’s death, Mimi had pictures of Julian all over her home but when she found out that John’s widow Yoko Ono inherited the ownership of her home, a terrified Mimi changed the pictures from Julian to Sean in case of a surprise visit or something like that. Other than that, not much is known about Mimi and Julian except that Mimi thought Julian should get a proper job rather than being a musician. But, to be fair, she thought the same way with John and hoped that Sean wouldn’t go into the music business (he did!). Mimi died in 1991 with Cynthia, Yoko and Sean attending the funeral.

"I think Julian ought to get a real job. I've heard him sing and it's not my cup of tea. Julian doesn't keep in touch, not that it worries me too much." 

Mimi, 1983

“Oh, I think for about five minutes, yes. When we bought her the house down in Poole [in 1965], we went to visit and she was all over him then, but apart from that there was no contact. She wasn’t a doting surrogate grandmother or anything like that.” 

Cynthia, 2005

Elizabeth (Mater)
Mater lived in Scotland where John spent his vacation time as a child. Cynthia got along beautifully with Mater, often taking a train up to visit when life in London got too much for her. Mater also visit the Lennon family in Surrey. After John divorced Cynthia and remarried to Yoko, they took Julian and Yoko’s daughter Kyoko on a spontaneous holiday to Scotland and visited Mater. During the visit in 1969, Mater wasn’t too thrilled with the new wife and didn’t hide her feelings, much to John’s dismay that he stormed out. The family got into a car accident and since Julian was least injured, he was discharged from the hospital into Mater’s care until Cynthia arrived. Mater died in 1976

Harrie, Julia and Nanny

Anne Georgina (Nanny)
Hmmm… I got nothing other than that there was a family relationship that is not much known. Nanny died in 1997.

Julia
Julian’s grandmother and namesake. Julia died in 1958, just before John got involved with Cynthia. She was taken to Sefton General Hospital where she was pronounced dead- the same hospital where Julian was born.

Lucy Bayliss, Cynthia, Julian, Jacqui and Julia

Her daughters, Julia and Jacqui, are close to Julian. They helped Aunt Harrie cared for him when Cynthia traveled with John and visited them in Surrey. They barely have a relationship with their other nephew, Sean.

“I don’t know if Sean and Julian have a relationship. I think so, they talk well of each other, but I’m really an aunt to Julian.” 

Julia, 2016

Harriet (Harrie)
Harrie was not only the baby of the Stanley sisters but also the baby sitter. After Julia’s death, Harrie became her daughters Julia and Jacqui’s guardian. Harrie lived in the same neighborhood as Mimi; Cynthia visited often and after Julian’s birth, Harrie babysat Julian whenever Cynthia went traveling with John until they moved down to London. Harrie died in 1972 with Cynthia attending the funeral.

A Day With the Prime Minister

John, Cynthia, Ringo and Maureen Starr spending the day with Trinidad and Tobago's Prime Minister Dr. Eric Williams and his daughter Erica. 

Photographed by Noel P. Norton

Art Gifts For Julian

Artwork by Cynthia Lennon as a gift for her son Julian

"Losing a parent young, is devastating. I can only try to educate him, to make him feel that his father did love him even if he can't tell him any more. I need him to see that there was love there, to see the letters his Dad wrote to me and to say 'OK darling, he was a man, a simple man with a massive talent and what you have to do is get under the skin of that man rather than read about him in those trashy books.' And I hope that if Julian is ever feeling bitter and rejected he can look at the paintings and feel better." 

Cynthia, 2000