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Cynthia's Life Wisdom

Cynthia, around 1969-1970

 On what would've been Cynthia's 83rd birthday, here's some quotes to celebrate her life:

"Pretty evenly balanced, I would say. I hope I take the best out of life. It's the only way to survive. I had some fantastic times, I also had some very tragic times, but there are many people who have such extremes. You just get on with it."

Cynthia, 1995

"I've not altered since the Beatle days. I have always been the same. It is the people and places around me that have changed."

Cynthia, 1980

"It was Julian who kept me on earth. John was gone most of our marriage. He belonged to the rest of the world. Julian was the best thing that came out of our marriage. I've done well. I'm not a junkie, I'm not an alcoholic. And it's probably because of Julian."

Cynthia, 2006

“Instead of living with somebody, I get married. That’s me. I like the solidity of marriage. I think the shadow of John is always there. I’ve had a very interesting married life. I’ve been married longer than most people, but to different men."

Cynthia, 2005

"It just comes naturally if it’s what you believe in. Many years ago I did Beatles conventions and I never thought I could do that, but once you’ve been in that situation, been on a platform being questioned by 2000 Beatles fans, you just go back, it’s what you’ve learnt,what you’ve experienced."

Cynthia, 2007

"You get what you ask for in this life, it’s as simple as that. If you want to go out there and self promote, that’s easy enough to do, you can do that anywhere. But if you know the right places to go, the right people and you have good friends then you can live a normal life. If you want all of that Tinseltown stuff, you can have it, if you don’t, you don’t, it’s up to you."

Cynthia, 2007

"The 10 years I spent with John are part of what I am."

Cynthia, 1999

"I come from a family of very placid, quiet people, and I have always been the same. Nothing that's happened to me in the whole Beatles saga has done anything to change that. I've never once felt in need of a psychologist. In fact it's funny, because Julian recently came home and told me he'd been to a psychologist in America at his girlfriend's insistence. She wanted to sort their relationship out or something. But he said, 'Mum, they're all crackers there. You're my analyst and you don't cost anything,' so we're each other's shrink!"

Cynthia, 1994

"He changed my life...well, he didn't, but the whole situation changed my life completely. God knows where I would've been ended up. I probably would've been a school teacher with about three or four children in a boring situation. I've had the most amazing life, a wonderful life. I'm still alive and kicking. I've got the best son anyone could possibly wish for in the world and a marriage to a wonderful man [Noel Charles] also. Sounds very gushing, but I'm really happy. And all the experience has not spoiled anything for me, I promise you. I still open my eyes in the morning and feel a beautiful, sunny day in Spain and think how lucky I am."

Cynthia, 2005

Long Beautiful Hair

Cynthia and John in New York City, February of 1964

I haven't really discussed anything about John's hair, it's pretty much a known story that John got his Beatle haircut in Paris by a Hamburg friend as it was a popular hairstyle in Europe, yet Astrid Kirchherr gets heavy credit for popularizing. That was done in 1961 after having Elvis Presley inspired "duck arse" style for a few years. Cynthia loved it. Maybe because of Astrid, Maureen Starkey*, and perhaps Pattie Boyd*, or her mother's friends who frequent the hair salons, Cynthia got swept by cutting hair herself. Maybe it was the thing back then as my grandmother was also interested in cutting hair herself... except hers get disastrous results! Her children have quite a few school pictures of hair not evenly straight and, I too was a victim of her shaky hands trying to cut hair. Grandma loved it, but couldn't do it. Cynthia must've done well because John never appeared to have a bad hair day (*Both Maureen and Pattie worked in the hair salon. Maureen was a trainee and Pattie was offered to become a model while doing a modeling agency woman's hair. Also to note that Linda McCartney cut hair as well...).

Q: When did you last go to the barber's? (Press Conference, 1966)

"I haven't been to a proper barber for years. George often cuts my hair when we're on the road and Cyn does it when I'm at home." John

Cynthia wrote in her book, John, that she also cut his father Freddie's hair when she met him for the first time in 1965. Freddie's hair was long and unkept; he happily accepted his daughter-in-law's offer. I suppose Cynthia stopped cutting John's hair around 1967 after Magical Mystery Tour era as John's hair got long during the India era in early 1968.

Then there's Cynthia's hair. Cynthia was originally a reddish-brown before she dyed it blonde and remained blonde about 99% the remainder of her life. There's two sides of the story (which I already covered early in the blog... here's a recap:)

1) John "made" Cynthia go blonde. 

Yet Cynthia insisted (maybe about 15 years before she died) that...

2) Cynthia dyed it before dating John while in an experimental and funny frenzy with best friend Phyllis Mackenzie.

Sorry, Cynthia, but I have to go with 1, John "made" Cynthia dye her hair. There's pictures of proof that Cynthia indeed had dark hair when she started to date John, dyeing her hair afterwards. I'm sure Phyllis was indeed there when Cynthia changed her hair color, but it's got to happen AFTER Cynthia started her relationship with John, not BEFORE.

Well, anyway, the point is that Cynthia happily changed her hair color and started to grow it long. Her short dark hair wasn't doing much impressions on anybody, that's for sure.

Anyway, all was well with each other's hair until one night sometime in 1962-1963 (after moving in with Aunt Mimi and before Julian's birth)... John was due to arrive home and Cynthia wanted to look all pretty for his return. So, with her long beautiful blonde hair, she went to the hairdresser who convinced her to cut the hair short. When Cynthia saw the finished result... yikes! She pretty much started to freak out! It was TOO short for John's liking and she knew he wouldn't be happy. That night, when John was supposed to come home, Cynthia disguise her hair in curlers and was already sleeping when he came in. Then came morning... Cynthia obviously couldn't hide her hair and, sure enough, John got angry. However, Cynthia underestimate his anger - John was ANGRY! After he had his fit, John gave Cynthia the silent treatment for 3 days. Cynthia has mentioned she preferred the yelling than the silent treatment, as at least John was "talking" to her. 

"Poor John, it was all too much for him. Even though the Beatles' success was thrilling, and was the answer to all our prayers, there was something about the way things were going that wasn't right, for John. He wouldn't talk about it, and I was able to piece together only over time from bits and pieces that were said. They were recording their own songs and having hits with them, which was what they desperately wanted. But Brian had insisted on imposing a whole new image, which John was finding very hard to come to terms.with. It was all about a 'look' and an 'attitude' that simply were not John. He had to toe the line and behave himself now that they were in the spotlight. It was such a strain for him, concealing and repressing his true self, and he was bound to react against it every now and again. Me going and alternating my 'image', too, was more than he could take. He couldn't handle it. He wanted the old Cyn, the one he'd fallen for. He just wanted me to stay the same. I was too young and self-preoccupied to realize that at the time. I must have thought that I'd become dowdy and unattractive the minute my baby was born, and just wanted to zap myself up a bit. Whatever it was, it was a mistake. If I could, I'd have given anything to go back to the way things were."

Cynthia, 1989 

It does seem very ridiculous to be angry over a haircut. But, as Cynthia observed in a psychological views, John's career was changing and he wanted his home life - especially his wife - to be the same. To be able to have ONE thing in his life not to change. That being said, after 3 days of anger silence, John must have realized this was ridiculous as hair can grow back and forgave Cynthia. After that, Cynthia's hair did indeed grow long. 

There was a point in 1967 (Sgt. Pepper era) and 1968 (Rishikesh) when Cynthia's hair got dark to her natural hair color. I don't think John really minded, especially in 1967, and definitely in 1968 (he was ignoring her in India, anyway). 

In the 47 years Cynthia lived after her divorce from John, her hair barely changed since then. There was a time in the late 1970s (1978, when her first book was published) when Cynthia had a perm of curly hair and her hair looked darker... getting perms were the big  "thing" in the 1970s, 1980s so I can imagine Cynthia getting swept by that phase, and probably very relieved that she didn't have John around dictating on how her hair should look. Cynthia was once asked why she didn't dye her hair back to brown? She stated that that's how she liked to look. I suppose Cynthia thought she looked much better as a blonde... And I have to say, I agree. I can't imagine Cynthia with dark hair, it looked so strange whenever I come across a rare picture with dark hair - I'm so used to her as a blonde! Same thing with Madonna. 

The Lennon Family

Photographed by Henry Grossman

Leaving the Picture